Why did you let me go?

The End of something sardistic

..There was I lying on the floor bleeding and bleeding more. I was trying to get up but it was so damn hard. He just had the people killed whom I truly loved. He had killed my second oldest brother Bexter and my Cousin Collin as well as he had killed my aunt Gloria. Who had rised me and my brothers my whole life as her own. Collin wasn't her only child there was Alanna too.

Alanna isn't only my cousin but my best friend and is the person I trust the most. She and I always had each other since we are the only girls in our family. We are the same age so until now we always went to the same class.

I screamed in pain as loud as I could.

Tears wouldn't stop dripping down to my cheeks.

My chest hurts.

I turned around seeing my own brothers corpse. He tried to help me. He always tried to protect me even at the times he couldn't. He..he.. he did so much for my family. Didn't my ex Austin had any mercy? Was he really so brutal? Was he really using me all this time until now?

I shook my head in pity looking down to Bexters hand with all the scratches.

,,ugh I'll show you my true colors one day. Be ready !!!", I shout angrilyy.

I grunt when my hips sting. They'd be probably broken by now.

Austin maybe thinks that I'll die today and that he could take revenge for his parents to my whole family but I will fight for my family, fight for those who really need it. And no one is going to stop me. Ever

-two weeks after the incident-

It was my aunts, cousins and older brothers funeral.

We were all wearing black.

My body wasn't recovered yet and my uncle had already told me serval times to set another date for the funeral.

We hadn't told anyone since it would make us a target for our enemies.

We had to fake my death and instead send spies on him. We should have more informations in a few days by now.

Meanwhile I had to pretend to be a friend of mine. I had no real problem with it as long as I could take my revenge on him. I was scarred I really was but I had no other option. It was our only way.

We were going to our family's cemetery.

There I was. Standing in front of the gravestones.

I couldn't keep my tears longer than 2 minutes. Without any energy I started crying endlessly. I let myself fall to the ground with my knees. My scratches and wounds were burning. I could one stich popping up. But I kept quiet.

,,Xenna please get up. You're hurting yourself", I heard my brother Dean say.

My other brother Matteo laid his hand to Dean.

My uncle wasn't even here anymore. He had already broken up in tears the same as me. He was swayed away the same way I was.

As I wasn't it seeing coming. He also let himself fall on his knees to the ground.

,,let her be boys", he waved my brothers down so they could drop it.

Alanna didn't showed up but I knew that she was here earlier because of the flowers on all three graves.

I wanted to pull out the note my brother had left me. I was about to read it when Dean stopped me.

,,Stop please. Don't read it now.", he said softly.

,,Why?", I asked him confused

He sight: ,, we wanted to give you a letter each birthday from your 18 th birthday on in case something happens.. like this and tell you advices you should take to heart and this one here was one of the last ones his letter should have been opened on your 23 th birthday. So basically everyone wanted to join and Uncle wanted to start the next should have been Alanna, she gave us no chance to say something..", he laughed slightly

,,after Alanna Aunt Victoria should've been the next in line. After her it would've been my turn and then ..Collin. He was offended to be one of the last's but we can't blame him really and especially now. He still got really excited when he heard, he was going to add a big surprise which I never got to know but he made sure that you'll receive it either way. Well after Collin there was still Matteo left and..Bexter. Apparently he had something very special to say and give to you. I have no clue what it is but I'll guess you'll find out in a few years.

My tears were heating up.

,,Why didn't you tell me sooner??!", I looked up to him. Feeling anger

,,Well we wanted to tell you that like a month ago but you wouldn't listen", he sniffed holding his tears back.

Ugh I couldn't blame him. It was my fault not his. I bet he was thinking about how they were planning it.

,,S-sorry.. I wasn't thinking", I opened my arms to him.

,,hugs?"

Instead of answering he hugged me back allowing himself to spill a few tears.

I felt how his tears made my dress wet and I couldn't care less about the fact. He might've been the eldest brother I had but he still had a heart. You know.

Matteo just looked at us poorly.

I had to laugh a little about his facial expression.

My brothers were confirmed.

I rolled my eyes.

,,don't make such dumb faces and join us you asshole", I said putting my tongue out.

,,Oh you b-", he started remembering that I'm the youngest and my uncle was here he stopped himself.

Lucky boy. This time you had luck Matteo but next time I'll get you.

Watch me. Pah!

Matteo wasn't a fan of hugging Dean but he was powerless in that moment.

,,he's not going to rip my head off? Right?", he murmured glaring at Dean.

Dean looked innocently in his direction. Smirking just an ounce.