BEING YOURS

CHAPTER FORTY-TWO

And it was almost dawn so he'd be up soon.

She quietly left, making a beeline to the kitchen to whip him something to eat.

Not sure what he'd prefer, she made pancakes, sandwiches, noodles and a bowl of fruit salad. She's still making the salad which was the last dish when he entered and a smile stretched on her lips as he hugged her from behind.

"Good morning Princess." He kissed her ear.

"Good morning big guy. Slept well?"

"Like I've never before, can't believe I'm still sleepy though. I've forgotten that name to be honest."

She chuckled. "You prefer Ash?"

"They're both cute." He nuzzled her cheek, lifting up her gown so he could feel her skin.

"You're obsessed with my waist."

"I'm obsessed with you." He corrected, his fingers caressing her tummy.

She turned around, his fingers not slipping off for a second. "I'm on a dress y'know, you wanna get me naked?"

He smiled. "I told you before, I'll lift it up."

"I'm still struggling to get my shape back." She complained, feeling insecure.

"You didn't change much, unlike me."

"You're cuter with those chubby cheeks." She teased, hanging her arms over his shoulders.

During his treatment, Ali has really added weight.

"Don't go there Princess, don't go there."

She giggled. "You're perfect A, stop worrying."

He smiled, breathtakingly as usual but it wore off almost immediately. "Did you sleep last night?"

She pondered on an answer to give him, her expression giving away the fact that she's thinking of a lie. "Yes um, but just a little." She decided to 'not lie'.

His face dropped to a helpless expression.

"I'm okay really, I wasn't sleepy that's why."

"I wouldn't have noticed if you didn't have eyebags. Princess you should put more effort, please."

"I was just not sleepy." She mumbled nervously.

"Look I know it's hard but you should still try. Go to bed with wudu', pray, recite adhkars until you fall asleep it'll help. And above all accept that she's gone, she's gone and never coming back, she doesn't cry for help, you can't have her back. She doesn't exist anymore."

"I know."

"But you still lack sleep."

"It's just..." She trailed off, not knowing what to say.

"Is there something else?"

She looked in his eyes, hesitant. "No, there's nothing."

He took his hands off her waist and cupped her face, lifting it back up. "What is it?"

She started shaking her head.

"Spit it out."

She sighed, sure that he wouldn't relent and surer that she really wanted to say it. "Do you really have to go?" She paused before continuing. "I mean they'll all be there, Ya Mansur, Ya Umar, Ya Khalil and Yusuf, it won't be a big deal if you don't make it will it?"

He was quiet for a long while and she looked down at their feet, heartbroken. What was she thinking? Of course he had to go.

His fingers caressed her wet hair, pushed back her head and sealed a soft kiss on her forehead. "I wouldn't if I had a choice Princess." He pulled back to view her face. "If all of them won't make it, I must be there. This is the first time he's going home after coma, he needs everyone possible there, he needs a lot of support. And we'll have to settle things in Yola cos Yusuf won't be there anymore. And then we'll go to Zaria and I'll formally hand things down, go to the base and know what my stand is. A week Princess, just give me a week and I'll be right back before you know it. And the next time I'll be leaving, we'll be going back home, together, to a new life, just you and I, hmm?"