Chapter 6: Too deep

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"But he will find out."

Ash looks at his reflection in the bathroom mirror and smiles. There was something about Luca that he felt a kin to. That conflict between being yourself but feeling the need to fit in somewhere at the same time. Ash soon realised, that when he stopped trying to put himself into a pre labelled box, where he never felt right, where he had to act a certain way, the pressures in his mind were lifted. He was Ashley Brown, he was defined by his own labels.  Nobody else's.

He leaves the bathroom expecting to see Luca waiting, but is left with an empty space. "Luca?" He calls, but it seems the guy had deserted Ash… again!

***

"Where have you been?" Noah questions as he looks at Luca in the reflection of the mirror from his hair and makeup chair. 

"Just needed the bathroom." Luca replies, taking his place in the chair next to Noah.

Noah side eyes Luca's profile. He sees the nervous bounce in Luca's leg as Luca reaches forwards to a tub, flicking open the lid to retrieve a mint, which he pops into his mouth. Noah waits for the makeup artist to leave them in momentary peace, before he turns to Luca, in the swivel seat. "Have you been sick again?" Noah questions under his breath. 

Luca shakes his head, not even looking at Noah. "I'm fine." He repeats, but Noah grabs a hold of one of the arms of Luca's seat and pulls him around. 

"Look at me Luca." Noah insists as Luca's eyes reluctantly look up to his bandmate. "I've known you since we were 17. I can tell something is wrong. Tell me."

Luca looks at Noah and wonders if he should confess his possible transgression. "I…I think I have got myself in a situation, but it might be ok. At least I hope it's ok." 

"What do you mean by situation?" Noah wondered furrowing his makeuped brow a little. 

"Ok…" Luca clears his throat. "So you know the other night, after our first show…"

"When you wandered off and nearly got flattened by fans…" 

Luca looks at Noah, choosing not to bite. He continues. "Well, I kind of collided with a guy and honestly Noah, he saved me from the masses." 

"Okaay?" Noah sits back in thought. "So what is it? Is he gonna spill the tea to the press? Say you were a scared little lamb. Lost and all alone in the dark night?" He laughs it off. "So what?" He gets a few hundred for the scoop and you say nothing as usual. Sorted." 

"It's not as simple as all that." Luca interrupts. "He didn't know who I was." This causes Noah to snort out a laugh.

"Yeah right. He didn't know who you were." 

"I'm serious!" Luca insists. "He thought I was being chased because I was a criminal. A mobster, he said." 

"A mobster!" Noah now bursts with laughter. "Now you are playing with me."

"I'm not playing." Luca tries to keep a straight face. 

"Ok ok." Noah holds his hands up in defence. "So he doesn't know who you are. That's even better all things considered. "I don't understand what your problem is." 

Luca looks down on himself, the reality hitting him once again as to what he had done. 

"The man..I was intrigued, so I made contact with him again." Luca screws his eyes closed at the possible onslaught he may get from Noah, but opens them again when he hears silence. He looks at Noah who is smiling at him. 

"Welcome to my world my friend." He gives a devilish grin. Before leaning in out of earshot. "So, how was he?" 

Luca pulls back from Noah in shock. "Hey, it…!" He stops himself, realising the shrillness of his voice. He continues through gritted teeth in a much quieter tone. "...it wasn't like that. I just wanted to see him. That's all." 

"So, you didn't, you know…" he whistles as he quivers his brows. To which Luca shakes his head furiously. "So why bother then, what's the point?" Noah wonders. 

"I don't know?" Luca sighs. "I just wanted to see him again because he didn't know me as Luca from UC, He just knew me as regular Luca and something in me, something stupid I guess thought because of that, maybe, I could have something which maybe resembles normal. 

"But he will find out." Noah points out the obvious. 

"I know and soon." Luca says, swallowing hard. "He's a VIP. I gave him a ticket. I've just managed to see him at the blackspot."

"And by the way of this conversation, you still failed to tell him the truth." 

"I did try." Luca insists. "I told him my name at least, but I couldn't find the words to follow." 

"Shit Luca... and he still didn't figure?"  Noah says with surprise.

"He just thought I was a fan. That's why I look the way I do." 

This comment makes Noah laugh. He blows a shot of air out of his mouth, "Well I guess there's nothing you can do about it now, but here's how I see it. One, he doesn't catch on. He just thinks you look like, well you, but that's not likely. Two, he totally realises you are Luca from UC and he goes all starry eyed and loves you for it."

Luca didn't like the sound of the second option. "Then he would treat me like an idol. I don't want that. 

"There's one more." Noah interrupts, holding out a third finger. "He finds out your Luca from UC and hates you for deceiving him." 

Luca gazes ahead at his own reflection. He wishes he was back in the cupboard with Ash, in the ignorant bliss they had found themselves in. Anywhere but here, where in a matter or hours, his secret would be revealed and his world may turn upside down, never to be the same again. 

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