Varian x Reader Oneshots

Varian x Body Swap! Reader

You and Varian feeding Ruddiger and all the other raccoons that show up on your front door step ^^^^^

HAHAHA IT'S A GUILTY PLEASURE OF MINE AND I WILL MAKE YOU SUFFER THROUGH THIS HAHAHA

(also the reader in this one is described as more feminine and wears dresses but you can change it up if you wanna)

also I made some u n h o l y s u g g e s t I o n s but nothing actually happens between them cos I'm an innocent child :)

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Y/N POV 

I was vibing in my best friend's lab when I grew increasingly bored over the silence.

"Hey Var," I whispered. "Varritos. Varian. Vee. Vacuum. Varied Berry-" I kept bothering the workaholic.

"Ugh, what is it now Y/N?" He didn't even look up from his work.

"What are you making??????" I asked, sitting on the table.

"Hey, get off of that!" He pulled a formula out from under my thigh (leg? idk).

"Ha. You touched my thigh like a little virgin," I joked.

"Shut up Y/N," He chuckled, going back to his work. I grabbed the test tube he was working with and looked at it. "Don't touch my stuff!" He took it back. "You can test it after I'm done," 

"Var, why am I always the test subject?" I groaned. 

"Because I don't want to give Ruddiger odd mutations," He grinned looking up.

"You can't lie to me Var, I know you looooooooooove me~" I played down on the desk only for Varian to shove me off, laughing.

"In your dreams," He poured another mixture into the tube. I sat up and called over our son, Ruddiger. He jumped in my lap and I pat his fluffy head.

"The baby needs his father's attention." I stated, holding up the raccoon.

"Stop that-" He turned his head and was startled by the raccoon and flung back out of his seat. "The serum!" I ran over to the desk and caught the tube before it could spill out. I laughed helping Varian to his feet.

"So...can I try it now?" He rolled his eyes and rummaged through his desk. "I'll take that as a yes," I chugged the bottle. 

"Okay but before you do that, I need to add a little more-yoU DRANK IT!?!?!?" I noticed a strange tingly feeling all over. I made eye contact with Varian and then my skin started glowing. His did the same. 

"What the heck is happening?-"

The light was so bright, I had to cover my face with my sleeve. I then opened my eyes and saw...me? I looked down and saw Varian's gloves over my hands. I rushed to a mirror and saw that I looked like-

"NOOO I'M NO LONGER HOT!" I heard Varian I mean, me cry.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA WHAT- WHY-"

"WHY'D YOU DRINK IT?" He/I yelled.

"I-I doN'T knOw- vAriAn, hoW dO yoU kEEp yOur VoiCe fRoM cRACkiNg sO muCh?"

"Shut up Y/n, I don't how you breath with this stupid dressy corset thing!" He tried pulling it off put kept tightening it. "Ugh, I can't believe you drank it!" 

"You said I coULD!" 

"STOP TALKING LIKE THAT! YOU GOTTA SPEAK IN A LOWER TONE!" He told me. He/I looked around the room and all I could focus on was that I'm currently in the cutest person on the planet's body! Also that I look super hot in that outfit. He looked back and asked me a question. "Y/N, what are you looking at?"