Levi x Crying! Reader

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What was I suppose to do when I learned that my best friend was a titan that killed most of my comrades? Annie was an amazing person even though she was terrifyingly blunt. She was mean in some cases, but she was really kind to me. To learn that she killed so many people, most of whom I became close friends with was heart-wrenching. What was I going to do?

I was going to cry!

I hid myself in the castle of the Survey Corps, wanting to be alone. The one I trusted so much was dead to me. Annie wasn't who I thought she was. She basically lied to me. I mean, when I learned that Eren was a titan, I didn't freak! As a matter of fact, I was amazed. Didn't Annie know that she could have told me and I wouldn't scream about it?

But knowing that she killed so many people made her a murderer. I hate to turn my back on her, I really do, but...it hurts.

I curled in the corner of a small couch in a tiny room on the west wing of the castle. Not many people travel down this way unless told to do so by the superiors. Not that people didn't know I was already crying. I started sobbing during dinner just by hearing someone say her name. I wish I could put a gag order on them, making sure they didn't even mention her around me. However, I'm not a superior, so I can't.

"(Y/L/N)?"

I gasped quietly as I stopped crying. My heart beat raced, and my eyes widened in fear.

Captain Levi found me?!

I pulled my legs to my chest and mumbled incoherently that it was me. I heard the door creak as I stared out of the window, tears still staining my eyes.

"I know you feel unhappy."

I smiled, knowing that this was as close as Captain's emotions as anyone could get. This seemed to be the brim of it, but I knew that this was all emotion he could offer. I nodded and dropped my smile. "You're correct, sir."

I heard his footsteps come closer to me and heard him kneel down by me. I turned my head, blinking my (e/c) eyes at him. His grey eyes were soft and his face showed no sign of irritation. I softened my eyes, whispering, "I regret knowing her like how I did. I regret being her friend."

He placed a hand on my cheek and rubbed a tear away. He sighed and said, "There was absolutely no way you knew how the outcome of your friendship would be. You found her personality intriguing, which is why you became friends. There was no way any of us could have predicted this at all. Don't regret this."

He shifted so he was on his knees, his jacket ruffling a bit. He leaned in closer and said, "Don't regret something you once wanted. Don't regret that, because at one time, you were happy with your choice. You picked the choice that you'd least regret, right?"

I nodded and let my feet touch the floor. My eyes watered, my lips pulling back. I touched his hands and agreed, "You're right, Corporal. I shouldn't regret something that I wanted. I just wish I knew."

His lips, his soft pink lips, brushed against mine, making my stomach turn with bliss. "We all did."

I let out a sob as he linked his fingers softly in my hair. I grabbed his strong hands more tightly, not wanting my Captain to leave me. He brushed a hair out of my face and said, "Say my name."

I blushed and whispered, "Levi."

He kissed my cheek and said, "Let me hear it again."

I closed my eyes, feeling his lips by my earlobe. "Levi..." I said, crying still.

He stared at me and said, "(Y/F/N)..."

I cried, wishing that none of this happened. That Marco was still alive, that no one on the 57th expidition died. This pain, I don't want to feel it again. I don't want to. It hurts.

"You're..." Levi started.

I cried as he leaned in closer. "You're crying so much."

He finally pressed his lips to mine, making me lean into him. I wrapped my fingers in his short hair, feeling him shiver.

Something about this kiss told me that it was better for those people to die. Futuristically, they would have died anyways. It is better for them to go to heaven to see their friends and family who have already died. That way, they see those that they love and leave this beautifully cruel world. They get to wait for us, making us even more joyful when we get to see them.

Making them love us just that much more.

But right now, I was busy loving Levi, the captain who lost everyone. Levi, the captain who's been through it all, twice even. He still cares, he still has a heart, and that's all that mattered to me. This kiss may end in fire, cuts and burns, but I learned something.

I want this, and because I do, I won't regret it.

He pulled away, letting me catch my breath, and whispered, "I will never regret that."

I blushed, feeling the back of his hand ghost over my cheek. Shivers were sent down my spine as I whispered, "I will never regret that either, Levi."

And I never did.

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