Unaware {M.R.}

twenty-two

Theodore's POV

Saturday.

// "You've done enough." / "You're trouble, Theodore." / "You are reckless." / "Stop trying when you know you'll fail." / "Look what you've done to your mother, Theodore." / "Should have known you'd be a disgrace." //

The words were on repeat in my mind. It's a never ending cycle of parental support.

Of course there's no such thing as love in the Nott house. It's told to be simular to the Black house, however that turns out.

I was told by a house elf that I was only taught on a hard life, because my parents believe love is a sort of weakness. Yet, why is it only love I want?

It's quite funny to think if it came from someone else. Theodore Nott actually just wants to be loved. It's tough to believe, others say. But I'm just another person, aren't I?

"So easy to be heartless."

The 5 words I never wanted to hear. From her none the less. Like a tattoo burnt into my skin.

I do have a heart. I am still a person.

"Heartless, aren't you? Is it even possible to care?"

Two questions, and 9 words for heartbreak. She never knows the truth, yet she says more than required. It breaks my heart. The one heart I actually do have.

But still, it's her heart I want.

~

"Learning?"

I groaned at the sound of Draco’s voice.

"Yes. It's an important Astronomy test, Draco. You should know."

"Don't care," he said, stepping beside his bed. "We're planning on heading to the back for a smoke. Coming?"

I looked at my book, then at Draco. "Sure," I said before I could stop myself.

I stood up, grabbed my jacket, before following Draco out of the dorm while pulling on my jacket.

We found ourselves soon behind the Herbology greenhouses on a open pitch field, yet luckily unseen by the teachers.

Blaise, Draco, Pansy and for some reason also Mattheo didnt hesitate to light themselves a joint. Took me a while, before I found myself with a cigarette between my fingers.

"I'm bunking Astronomy Monday. Anyone in?"

I looked at Blaise as I inhaled smoke.

"Sure," Draco said, before looking at me. "We can go to Hogsmeade."

"Not me," I spoke, the smoke flying from my lips.

Blaise laughed as he flicked off some ash. "So what? You're going to write that test? Have you seen the demarcation? Crazy man."

"So what?" I said, looking at him. "You're just not going to write it and lose 40% of your grade? You'll fail man."

"Really?" Pansy asked, looking at me.

I have a nod as I put the cigarette between my lips again. She looked at me with wide eyes.

"No way then," she said, pushing her cigarette bud against the grass, before standing up. "I'm off. Gotta study. I'll see you guys."

And she vanished.

"And you're here, why?" I asked, my eyes glaring at Mattheo.

Draco clicked his tongue. "Theo, no."