Elayne Starwind - Padawan of Ashoka

Chapter Fourteen

"Jacen!" I yelped and jumped from my sitting position. I raced under Jacen's body and caught him just in the nick of time.

"Jacen!" I repeated and layed him on the grass. "Oh no, oh no, oh no..."

I put my ear to Jacen's chest and was relieved to hear the thumping of his heart. Slow, but still there.

I nearly lost my breath when I realized what the thump had been from. The boulder.

He lifted the boulder.

No wonder he fainted. He used too much of the Force. He was exhausted.

Wow, at such a young age... I couldn't even do that yet.

Then again, he'd been training for weeks now.

"Come on, Jacen," I whispered and shook his shoulders. "Wake up!"

Jacen layed still as the boulder.

I slammed my fist against the ground. This was all my fault. I told him what to do and as a consequence, he succeeded... And drained all his strength right along with it.

I couldn't just leave him here on his own. Then again, I couldn't bring him back to the base. People would think it was my fault.

Just let him rest for now. If he didn't wake up, then I would bring him to base and accept punishment.

Really. Harsh. Punishment.

I sighed and leaned him upright against the rock. There was nothing to do but wait now.

... And maybe call Ahsoka for help.

But that would mean leaving him here.

And also saving his life.

Ugh, why was getting help so difficult? That was probably just me making it hard though.

Wait. Just wait, Elayne. Wait and meditate. Stop making it hard on yourself.

I sat cross legged atop the boulder Jacen succeeded in moving and closed my eyes. The goal was to remain calm, just as Ahsoka told me...

My hand slid off of my knee and slightly slid along the rocky texture of the boulder. Suddenly, emotions of all sorts mixed into my mind.

Anger. Sadness. Fear. Determination.

My head ached and throbbed back and forth between feelings of war.

I screamed in pain. War... War hurt.

Blasts from everywhere... A single lightsaber.

Betrayal.

I screamed louder. It hurt... It hurt...

"Ahsoka!" I cried. What was happening to me?

"Argh!" Tears started streaming down my face. "Make it stop, make it stop!"

The sound of a body falling down on the rock.

A dead body.

All blasts stopped.

I panted back and forth.

Betrayal.

~~

"No!"

I shot up to find myself laying on a bed, surrounded by all sorts of doctors.

"Where... Where am I?" I asked quietly.

Shuffling stopped.

I hated attention.

Ahsoka squeezed through the crowds of doctors. "Elayne! You're awake!"

Awake was one way to say it. I didn't want to be awake. To remember all those emotions mixing together like a bowl of bad soup.

Really, really bad soup.

"Jacen," I muttered. "Is he... Is he okay?"

Ahsoka nodded. "He came running to us for help... He told us you were unconscious."

"He's awake?" I asked, wide-eyed.

Maybe I hadn't entirely failed at my simple job.

"Yeah," Ahsoka said. "But he was really out of it when he got here. Really bad shape. Exhausted. He's in another medical room for examination, though we suspect it was an overuse in the Force."

"It was," I sighed. "And it was my fault. I told him how to lift that boulder."

Ahsoka's eyes widened. "The one you were laying on? He lifted it?"

"For a few seconds," I confirmed.

"And you did the same thing?" Ahsoka asked.

I shook my head. "I... I don't know what happened. One minute I was trying to meditate and the next... So much anger..."

"Anger?" Ahsoka questioned. "Why were you angry? With yourself?"

"No," I said. "Not with myself. I was calm, really calm. I was going to let Jacen rest and come back happily."

Ahsoka knitted her eyebrows. "Why didn't you come back sooner?"

I shrugged. "I wanted to do it myself. I would've been seen as irresponsible if I came back to base with an unconscious kid."

"All you did was worry everyone!" Ahsoka said. "You know how long you were gone?"

"No..." I muttered, though by her raise in tone she was pretty upset with the numbers.

"Hours," Ahsoka said. "It's practically the middle of night."

I swallowed. "I'm sorry. I'm such a failure. I can't even keep my emotions in check."

Ahsoka took a breath. "You're not a failure. You just need to learn. But what made you so angry?"

"I don't know," I admitted. "And it wasn't just anger. I was also scared... And sad. But determined."

"Determined for what?" Ahsoka asked.

"I don't know!" I repeated, frustrated. "But the emotion that really sunk deep was betrayal."

"And none of these emotions applied to how you were feeling at the moment?" Ahsoka asked.

I shook my head. "It wasn't until... Wait! I touched the rock and suddenly I felt this way!"

"Touched the rock?" Ahsoka asked, though it was mostly a question to herself.

All this confused me. I touch a rock, go unconscious, Jacen awakes, and suddenly I'm here.

At least Jacen woke up. That's all that mattered.

I attempted to pick myself up and sat in the bed.

Ahsoka's face lightened. She figured something out.

"You were focusing on the Force before you touched the rock, correct?" She asked.

I nodded in approval. But where was she going with this?

"Do that now," Ahsoka ordered. "Meditate. Concentrate on the Force."

I raised an eyebrow but followed her directions. I crossed my legs, closed my eyes, and put my hand on my knee.

Concentrate...

Ahsoka's hand picked my hand up and set it down on the bed I was sitting on.

"Tell me what you feel," Ahsoka said.

"Sadness and pain. Cries and pleads for help. People... Dying." My eyes started tearing up, and I was sure my face was getting red.

But then there was happiness.

"Now joyful people," I continued. "All the sadness and pain went away. Now it's just... Happiness."

"Just as I suspected," Ahsoka said and let go of my hand.

"What?" I asked and opened my eyes. As soon as I lost concentration, the happiness went away. I was stuck as same old me.

"You have a very rare ability in the Force," Ahsoka said. "Psychometry."