Back at the villain's hideout, Catwoman angrily thinks back to when Paul rejected her. The others try to cheer her up.
Catwoman: Who does he think he is? That boy has tangled with the wrong girl! No one says "no" to Catwoman!
The Joker: Darn right!
(Hands Catwoman a glass of water)
Catwoman: Dismissed! Rejected!
Publicly humiliated! Why, it's more than I can bear.
(Throws glass onto the ground)
The Riddler: More water?
Catwoman: What for? Nothing helps. I'm disgraced.
The Penguin: Who, you? Never! Catwoman, you've got to pull yourself together.
Gosh it disturbs me to see you, Catwoman
Looking so down in the dumps
Every girl here'd love to be you, Catwoman
Even when taking your lumps
The Riddler: There's no girl in town as admired as you
You're everyone's favorite girl
Everyone's awed and inspired by you
And there's no doubt you are such a pearl
The Joker: No one's slick as Catwoman
No one's quick as Catwoman
No one's sleeve has a nasty, cruel trick like Catwoman's
For there's no girl in town half as pretty
Perfect, a pure paragon!
You can ask any one of us wisely
And we'll tell you whose team we prefer to be on
Ensemble: No one's been like Catwoman
A queen pin like Catwoman
The Penguin: No one's got beauty from within like Catwoman
Catwoman: As a specimen, yes, I'm intimidating!
Ensemble: My what a girl, that Catwoman!
Give five "hurrahs!"
Give twelve "hip-hips!"
The Riddler: Catwoman's the best
And the rest is all drips
Ensemble: No one frights like Catwoman
Douses lights like Catwoman
The Joker: In a wrestling match nobody fights like Catwoman!
Ensemble: For there's no one as burly and brawny
Catwoman: As you see I've got plenty to spare
The Penguin: Not a bit of her's scraggly or scrawny
Catwoman: That's right, and take a good look at my nicely combed hair
Ensemble: No one hits like Catwoman
Matches wits like Catwoman
The Riddler: In a spitting match nobody spits like Catwoman
Catwoman: I'm especially good at expectorating!
Ptoooie!
Ensemble: Ten points for Catwoman!
Catwoman: When I was a lass I ate four dozen eggs
Every morning to help me get strong
And now that I'm grown I eat five dozen eggs
So precisely I'll never go wrong!
Ensemble: No one shoots like Catwoman
Makes those beauts like Catwoman
The Penguin: Then goes tromping around wearing boots like Catwoman
Catwoman: I use pawprints in all of my decorating!
Ensemble: My what a girl,
Catwoman!
After all that, Catwoman smiles. "I really needed this, thank you." She said.
Suddenly, John, George, and Ringo appear in a panic.
John: Help, someone help us!
The Joker: John Lennon?
The Riddler: George Harrison?
The Penguin: Ringo Starr?
George: Please, we need help! She's got him. She's got him locked up in Wayne Manor!
The Riddler: Who?
Ringo: Paul! We must go. Not a minute to lose!
Catwoman: Whoa, slow down, men! Who's got Paul locked up in Wayne Manor?
John: A she beast! A horrible, monstrous she beast!
Villains: (laugh)
The Riddler: Is it a big she beast?
George: Huge!
The Penguin: With a long, ugly snout?
Ringo: Hideously ugly!
The Joker: And sharp, cruel fangs?
John: Yes! Will you help us?!
Catwoman: Alright, alright! We'll help you out.
Ringo: You will? Oh, thank you so much!
Instead, the villains throw the three Beatles out the door.
The Penguin: Crazy old Lennon, Harrison, and Starr!
The Riddler: They're always good for laughs!
Catwoman: Crazy old Lennon, Harrison, and Starr, hmmm?
Crazy old Lennon, Harrison, and Starr...
Joker, I'm afraid I've been thinking
The Joker: A dangerous pastime
Catwoman: I know, but those wacky young blokes are Paul's friends
And their sanity's only "so-so"
Now the wheels in my head have been turning
Since I looked at those loony, young men
See, I've promised myself I'd be married to Paul
And there's no way I'll fail yet again
If I... (whisper)
The Joker: Yes?
Catwoman: Then we... (whisper)
The Joker: No! Would he...
Catwoman: Guess!
The Joker: Now I get it!
Both: Let's go!
No one plots like Catwoman
Catwoman: Takes cheap shots like Catwoman
The Joker: Plans to persecute harmless crackpots like Catwoman
The Riddler & The Penguin: And her marriage we soon will be celebrating
My what a girl
Catwoman!
From outside, the three Beatles are stuck in the rain. "Will no one help us?" Asked George desperately.
YOU ARE READING
Beatle & The Beast
RomanceEmilia Arquette has been turned into a beast for her nasty ways and must learn to love in order to break the curse on herself and all who live in Wayne Manor. When Paul McCartney of The Beatles comes along, he's terrified of Emilia, but she knows he...
