Jungkook's POV
She enjoys the late night drives, and I consider the moonlight shines better over her skin. That's why we ended up spending our sleep hours driving in the empty streets of Seoul.
Surprisingly, we found a hamburger stand this late, so while I drive the car through the streets, she feeds me and herself with the hamburgers all with our shared playlist on the speakers.
Y/N's telling me about her day and something about the green outfit she's wearing today.
Her hair has grown till the middle of her back so it's easier for her bangs to fly freely over her face with the wind that breaks through the window. The green fits her indeed, Anna was right.
She chews on a fried chip and humms in satisfaction at its flavor, then she feeds me one and I smile, not because of the taste but because I love seeing her so comfortable and happy with me.
She's such a view. This is her show, I'm just watching and definitely this is not a view I would want to lose.
"Orange or lemon?" I can see from the corner of my eyes how she points to the sodas in front of her.
"Orange" I chose and she gets the straw close to my lips.
"OH! This is my favorite song!" She turns on the volume and the masculine voice seems to sing for Adora's beauty.
I don't blame him, she's beautiful inside and out, which makes me think that, even if she pulled my heart right out my chest and drive a train through it, I sill get up an forgive her.
She again starts to tell a random story and I just listen, but can't stop daydreaming about where her lips been.
"Jungkook, stop the car here" Her stern voice stops my thoughts and makes me step on the car brake.
"Is everything okay?" I ask not understanding her sudden command.
"You're spacing out again... I don't want us to crash and die"
"Sorry" I say, looking at my feet
"Want to talk about what's on your mind?" She offered
Talk about what's on my mind? This is a dangerous move. My words might make her feel uncomfortable. Though, if she leaves me after that and doesn't come back tomorrow, I'll say at least she came tonight.
"You..." I need to look out the window so my voice doesn't shutters nor my eyes don't fall for her charms "... Told me that you love me but I know you're out there with them... running wild"
I can't even manage to say the things as my mind has them, I'm so nervous and sad but angry at the same time because no matter what she does, I'm still in love with her.
"You need to know that I'm not playing with your feelings, Jungkook" She said while reaching for my hand, this makes the anger and sadness melt. That is the effect she has on me, the one that I'm afraid of.
"Even if you were..." My eyes leave the window to meet her eyes "I love the way you hurt me. I'm willing to receive all the pain, everything from you..."
Her eyes open wide in surprise at my words, I know it does sounds masochistic but that's what I have on my heart.
"You're leaving me in pieces every time I see you with someone else... but when you come back to me, I swear the pain is worth it every time... And it doesn't even cross your mind, Y/N"
I let go of her hand to sit properly in my place, and she looks now to her feet. Did she realize about what she causes on me? Did it finally crossed her mind?
"I didn't know I was hurting you that much" She whispered
"It's easy to pretend that I'm not caught up, but when you are smiling for me, I can't give up the fight"
"I really love you, Jungkook" She said before looking deeply in my eyes "But I don't want to be the one that's hurting you" She said on the verge of crying.
"It's okay" I say resting one of my hands in her cheek, wiping away the tears that wet her features slowly "I let you use me from the day that you confessed and then disappeare..."
Guilt dances in her eyes but she said she wanted to hear everything my heart has, right?
"... But I'm not done yet with falling for you" I kiss her cheek, tasting the salty pain I caused "You're the fool's gold of mine"
A sob leaves her lips and I feel the need of hugging her. Thus, in the middle of a desert road, a street lamp lights up my seat, where Y/N sits on my lap as we hug each other.
We hurted each other but, that's what love is about, isn't it?
Her warm body, even if sad, keeps on amusing me. I get lost in her beauty and I can't see from two feet in front of me.
She intoxicated my mind and soul, that's the dangerous effect she has on us.
"But I don't regret falling for you, fool's gold" I kiss her temple and she looks up to me from my chest.
"My love is true but that's not the way it should feel. I'm sorry, Jungkookie"
"It's okay" I said, more than used to this feeling "Just keep on loving me and I'll sure do the same for you"
Finally, after all the tears, I manage to kiss her sweet lips. They taste like lemon and pain but somehow her lips make me feel loved. That's what I mean when I said that even if we don't know how to love, I'm addicted to this feeling.
"Let's go home, okay?" I say and she nods dragging her body back to the passenger seat.
The rest of the drive was drowned in dead silence, the music pretending nothing happened inside this car.
I help her leave the car and take her hand to go to the guest's room.
"Wanna sleep here or in my room?" I ask her.
"Your room"
"Then I'll take this one" I say pointing to the guest's room
"But I want you to sleep beside me"
My brain stops working at her request.
"We have done this before, Jungkook"
"Yeah, but not after... you know... discussing such topics"
We challenge each other with our eyes until I give up.
She's now laying beside me, in one of my t-shirts and her green shorts. I obligated myself to use a pajama and then I throw the blankets over us.
I close my eyes but snap them back open when she gets closer to me, hiding her face in my neck.
"I'll make it up to you, Jungkook" She said in a sleepy voice "I'll turn my love to the one you deserve. I promise you no more pain"
A light of hope lights up when she said that, would there be a day where we can love each other with the good kind of love?
______________
It felt like you needed to read these together, so enjoy x
VOCÊ ESTÁ LENDO
𝑷𝒐𝒊𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒐𝒖𝒔 𝑲𝒊𝒏𝒅 / OT7 x Reader
Fanfic"I do not believe in such a thing like soulmates, it's kind of weird if you think it's already written you're supposed to love someone just because" I said while looking into the camera man in front of me when I answered one of the reporters' questi...
