An Indescribable Feeling

Not One Hundred Percent

"I just don't see why Anna couldn't come with us."

"Who knows. Anyway, I'm going to pack and then I've got a few things to work on."

"I'll cook a nice breakfast for everyone."

As the three Idols parted ways, Hoseok went to Anna's bedroom and joined her in bed. As if sensing his presence, moments after he had laid down, she rolled over and snuggled up against him. The dancer smiled down at her and leaned forward to press a kiss on the top of her head.

With a sigh, Hoseok tried to remember the last time he'd had a lie in like this. It was odd not to have anything to do. They didn't need to leave for the flight for hours yet and he had already packed. That is if he was still going with the others that day.

Anna's hand which was resting on his chest clenched, holding onto his T-shirt. Hoseok rubbed his hand up and down her arm in an attempt to soothe her. A while later she woke up, not surprised that one of her soulmates had joined her. It wasn't unusual for her to wake up with one of them that hadn't been there when she had fallen asleep.

"How long until you leave?"

"There's still a couple of hours until the others have to go."

Anna nodded her head and with a small sigh, snuggled back against Hoseok until she processed what he had said.

"The others?"

"I'm not going with them."

"What? Is something wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong..."

As her soulmate looked at her, she understood. Anna had become better at reading her soulmates.

"It's because of me. Isn't it? I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry for. We just - We've noticed that you've been a little off recently."

There was a pause while Hoseok waited for Anna to speak.

"I don't know why."

"Why what?"

"Why I'm feeling this way."

"How are you feeling?"

"Sad. Lost. Empty... There's no reason for me to feel like this."

"Not everything has to be explained. You can't help the way you feel."

"But since I met you, I've been so happy."

"And before you met us?"

"I - I struggled. I guess it's been so long since I've felt this way that I'd forgotten what it was like."

Hoseok held Anna tighter as she talked. It pained him to hear how she had felt about life before meeting them. She had told them bits and pieces before, but it didn't make him want to wrap her up and protect her from the world any less.

"You know, it's been six months since you bonded with all of us."

"Is that all? It feels like longer."

"It's not widely known, because for most people it barely affects them, but for the first six months after bonding you're - I guess you could describe it as a happy high. You're less likely to feel negative emotions. I don't really know the specifics."

"You think this has affected me?"

"Perhaps. You see, for soul groups, things tend to be heightened. The emotions we feel through our bonds are more intense than compared to a soulmate pair. This means that the - let's call it the soul-bonding honeymoon - is likely to have a bigger effect on us too."

"And now the honeymoon is over... I'm depressed again."

"Oh, Sweetie! I wish I could take away every negative emotion for you."

"But without feeling bad we have nothing to compare feeling good to."

"Amazing. You are so precious. My precious Princess."

"Hobi!"

"I'm here for you. Whatever you need, I'm here. Okay?"

"I love you."

"I love you too."

Once everyone else was awake, they had a nice meal together. The afternoon was spent with most of the boys packing. Anna ran around making sure they all had everything they needed. Namjoon especially, was very gratefully when she came into his room with an armful of items he had been looking for or had forgotten about. he was also holding on to his passport until he was actually about to leave, not trusting him not to lose it before then.

Hoseok, since he wasn't leaving, watched her in amazement. Despite how she was feeling, he found it remarkable how she pushed through and tried to act normal while contemplating her existence.

They would only be apart for a few days, so saying goodbye would have been fine if some of Anna's soulmates hadn't decided to say such sweet words to her. Already feeling emotional, their loving gestures pushed her over the edge, and she couldn't stop the tears.

Anna and Hoseok spent the evening curled up on the sofa together with a blanket, watching movies, and ordered in for dinner. Late that night, Jungkookie video called from his hotel room where he had just arrived. The Maknae told them how funny it had been to fly alone.

The next few days before their flight to join the others in America, Hoseok followed Anna around like a puppy. Secretly, she enjoyed his constant company. At first, she had wondered how she was going to tell him she needed some alone time, but she never began to feel that way. Quality time with one of her soulmates like this hadn't happened since their holiday after they had bonded. After a few days the dark cloud inside her mind had faded, and she began to genuinely smile again.

When the day finally came and the two of them were on the plane to America, Anna was almost bouncing in excitement. She was also a little nervous as the only other long flight she had been on was the one to Korea at the end of BTS's world tour. Hoseok spent the long journey telling her stories of his trips to America.

What Anna didn't know was that when she arrived, her soulmates had arranged a special evening for her.