Demons of Wattpad

"Hazard Hall" (Fifty Shades of Hall)

[A little preamble: Evgenij was able to read this astonishing awful story in its Italian translation at the time when it was available on the Italian fanfiction website EFP.

However, the original version was in English, and, although now it is no longer possible to find it, we decided to translate its slating, thanks to the fundamental contribution of Spectrethief and JoSeBach. Also, due to the deletion of its original version in English, the fanfiction's quotes won't be literally accurate, as they have been translated back to English from the Italian version. Yet, they're as directionally accurate as the original quotes are.]

I really wonder how Justin Bieber would have reacted upon reading this fanfiction: indeed, here he is being described as a violent criminal who sells drugs and is obsessed with the end of a corridor of a public school.

Maybe it may seem strange (or perhaps not, since here we are used to the paranormal nature of these fanfics by now), but what I wrote above is precisely the nutshell of this story: Justin Bieber sells drugs, is violent, sexist and beats to death whoever passes through a certain corridor (hence the title).

The fanfic begins with this model, Savannah Hall, (ah, like the title! Ohmygod!) who returns from Canada and talks to her friend Dana.

Following the publication of the Italian version of this review, a reader wrote to me that there is actually a model called Savannah Hall, the physical characteristics of which seem to match the meager description of our protagonist. I did not notice this detail at first because I deliberately ignored the photos inserted in the fic to show the appearance of the characters.

Anyway, after a series of useless chatter, typical of the stereotypical American high school (stay away from the captain sport teams, the cheerleaders team leaders are "turd whores"...), the title is explained immediately.

Apparently in the school there is a hall that one cannot cross to the end because there is this guy who is a criminal, drug dealer, alcohol trafficker, former prisoner and almost murderer who beats to blood anyone who passes by. Ah, yes, he is also handsome and manwhore.

""There's one end of the hallway you can't go to."

"Which one?"

"Well, it's the corridor on the right at the end of the school, but we call it Hazard Hall."

"What the hell?" I laughed. "It's such a stupid thing! If I want to continue along that corridor, I will continue along that corridor."

"No, you won't, unless you want to be killed."

"Killed?"

"Well, yes... There's this guy, basically it's as if that's his corner of the school. It's not really popular, but he's hot. Rumors are circulating that he is part of a gang, but I don't know much about that. I'm sure he is a real drug dealer and an alcohol trafficker. However, he has been in prison several times for having almost killed someone. He's terribly scary. He's always in his little corner of the hallway during school hours, when he skips classes."

Dana took a deep breath before continuing her explanation.

"His mother is forcing him to finish high school and I just hope he can't say no to his mother. He's been held back, so I'm pretty sure he's 19 years old. His name is Justin and he is able to throw shit on every guy who tries to cross that corridor. Nobody knows why, surely there is an explanation for this. Some simply think he's crazy. Even though he's quiet and scary, he's a big manwhore and fucks with pretty much any walking thing, but he's never really had a relationship.""