Lights, camera, action! *SOUKOKU*

CHAPTER 2: Marigold

*TRIGGER WARNING: Explicit self-harming behaviour*

The couple opened the door and clumsily approached the bed in between kisses and hot breaths. Dazai was aggressive in his touches, too anxious at the moment with his need to satiate his frustration. The woman didn't care, in fact, it turned her even more. The brunette's mind was blurry and his thoughts couldn't quite process. His companion for the night started unbuttoning his shirt while he worked easily on her red dress. 

The woman sat on his lap and went for his pants once the upper clothing had been taken care of. Dazai helped her get the belt off and they kept kissing frantically until they were both naked. By now Dazai was lost in his mind, dazed by thoughts too far away from this world. It wasn't until the woman began getting dressed that he came back to Earth.

-W-wait, where are you going? -

-It's clear you were not into it. You barely looked at me and you're not even in the mood down there. I'd better leave than waste my time here. –

Dazai could do nothing to stop her. He sighed and sat against the door. It had happened again. He was so eloquent and attractive in public enough for him to get any girl he wanted yet he could never do more than simply making out. What was wrong with him? He walked to the bathroom and looked at himself in the mirror. His hair was messy and his now run make up revealed the huge bags under his tired brown eyes. 

The young man was skinny and of frail constitution but it was because of his terrible eating habits -or the mistreatment his body endured for that matter-. He could see his bones poking out of the dirty bandages that covered his upper body, arms and lower legs. He carefully took them all off, ugly old and fresh scars appearing underneath them. 

There were smooth small cuts on his wrists but once you got to see above them, the injuries became longer, wider and more grotesque. New cuts healed on top of older scars, each of them reminding their bearer of the pain he had caused his own body. But it was the suffering inside him the one that hurt Dazai the most. 

He sat on the edge of the bathtub and took a sharp piece of wide glass from the counter. The actor liked it more than any other sharp instrument because it made bigger cuts. He chose his thigh to do for tonight. A slow but precise cut drenched him with dark scarlet liquid. Nonetheless Dazai didn't cry or falter; he rejoiced in the pain. It helped him have control of at least one freaking thing in his life. 

His moment of bliss ended shortly after at the sound of his phone ringing. Dazai answered the call, not caring much about the blood trail he was leaving behind. The cunny voice of his agent, Mori, sounded at the other side:

-Hello, Dazai. Another victory for you I see. Well, I already knew you'd do fine but we have to think about what comes next. I suppose you are preparing for the next contract you signed? –

-Of course. Don't you already know how I am? I will be ready in no time. Don't worry about losing your money, boss. – Dazai said, a tone of bitterness highlighting the last word.

-I didn't expect less from my best actor. Keep it up, I'll be here soon to see how you're doing. Remember: you do NOT want to disappoint me. –

They ended the call and Dazai looked around at the evidence he had left throughout the apartment. Obviously by the time Mori arrived, this place would be clean of any trace.

Sorry if this Dazai is so depressed and a little bit OOC. He'll be more like himself in other chapters but it is also important to remember how he is on the inside behind all of that goofy guy façade.