Real or Not Real

Positive

I was late for Effie's and Haymitch's engagement party.

"Ugh" I groaned, pulling on my silver pair of heels as quickly as I could manage. But they were stubborn and didn't want to tie up around my swollen ankles.

It was summer and today was another hot day to add to countless other hot days that came before it. I swear, I hated hot days. I'd rather freeze than be hot. It made my skin sticky with sweat, my hair turned greasier quicker, spots formed on my face that I didn't want there. And it made me extra grouchy. I was grouchy enough, seeing as I was around 10 weeks pregnant.

Now, I can't be 100 percent on this, as I hadn't got the courage to take a pregnancy test yet. But seeing as I've missed two periods and that I was getting all the signs, swollen feet and ankles, sweats, mood swings, I was fairly positive on what that pregnancy test would show me.

I never imagined my life with children in them. My life had always been in a world where the Hunger Games existed, and now here I was living a life without them.

This pregnancy wasn't planned. Peeta wanted children. I knew that, and I was sure that we would have eventually talked about it and planned them one day, but I just never expected it to be this soon. We have been married for almost a year. The Hunger Games ended around 4 years ago, but still my heart and head sometimes felt like I was still there living that life.

Maybe I will always feel that way.

Maybe everyone will always be scarred for life by the events of the Games.

Finally I tied up the heels and stared at myself in the mirror.

Did I look pregnant? Some women showed straight away, walking around with small swollen stomachs and puffy faces that gave away their secret. Looking sideways in the mirror, I ran my hand over my stomach, examining. Nothing was noticeable yet. I looked fuller and slightly curvier since the Games, living with a baker who makes the best cheese bread will do that to you. I looked healthy for probably the first time in my life

But I definitely didn't look noticeably pregnant.

Maybe it was all in my head. I was shocked to feel a small pang of sadness at the thought of me not actually being pregnant.

I had to know, I couldn't wait any longer.

Before I made my way to the party, I quickly walked into town and bought a pregnancy test. I hid the test inside my purse and walked into the busy party.

Effie basically swamped me as soon as I walked inside. She looked beautiful as always, her wig was a glittering silver that matched the colour of her long eyelashes and long floor length dress. She reminded me of a glittering swan, swimming on a shiny lake.

You can take the girl out of the Capitol, but you can't take the Capitol out of the girl.

"Where have you been?" She asked, her voice slightly higher pitched than normal. Staring at her I couldn't help but notice that she looked flustered.

"Sorry, i uh..." I began then stopped when I realized she didn't actually care where I had been. She was looking around all flustered, her eyes darting from people to people and then rested on an empty plate of food.

"Never mind, so glad you're here darling." She said and tapped me on my nose. "We need more sandwiches!" She exclaimed and sped off, picking up the plate and disappearing into the kitchen.

"Uhh... okay." I said to myself and went in search of Peeta.

I found him leaning in an archway talking with Haymitch. I admired him as I made my way to him, he was wearing a loose shirt with the top button undone showing his chest slightly. His black trouser sat snuggly on his waist. He looked so hot, I swear lately he just looked so good, more than usual. My stomach tingled as he caught my gaze and gave me a small smile in greeting.