Soulmates ✓

19 | Healing; One Scar At A Time

She doesn't know how she managed to reach the bathroom across the hall because her limbs feel like running water, no balance, no equilibrium, and her head pounds like someone has been hammering it for hours. Then she feels it, his hand holding her hair and rubbing her back, up, down, up, down like her mother used to do.

"I don't feel good," her burning throat barely manages to spell those words out. She tries to get up and splash some water on her face, but her hand slips from the corner of the sink. She feels crazy weak, and her body doesn't seem to follow her orders. Thankfully, Ryan does.

"You're burning up, Shay." He curses under his breath and holds her wobbly self, supporting her weight as she scrubs the icky taste from her mouth. The peppermint mouthwash does wonders. He helps her wash her face and then picks her up in his arms.

Ryan says something to her as he carries her out of the bathroom. Shay can hardly make out her heartbeats, much less his words. She groans and rests her cheek on his shoulder. He doesn't bring her back to the couch. He takes her to the bedroom and eases her onto the mattress, then covers her in layers and layers of blankets.

She feels a little disconnected because one second, Aarav is looking down at her with his soft restless eyes. Then she blinks, and it's Ryan glaring down hard as he brushes his knuckles on her face.

"Aarav," she mumbles, not knowing what she's saying.

He puts a thermometer under her tongue, then counts on his watch before pulling the thermometer out of her mouth. All the while, his jaw remains tight with tension. "Fever is still high. You've to eat something so that I can give you medicine. Think you can keep down some fluids?"

She feels his palm against her forehead, her cheek, and then it's gone for god knows how many minutes or hours. There's hardly any of her senses working. She is sinking, sinking until his hand comes beneath her head, lifting it a little, and holds the juice to her lips.

The orange flavor tickles down her throat, soothing the dryness. He takes it away after a few sips then slides in a pill, her hand trembling as she holds his wrist while he brings the glass of water to her mouth.

"Please try to get some sleep." He pulls the blankets up to her chin and then brushes her cheek one last time. He doesn't show much on his face except for the clear signs of concern. He releases a deep sigh and lowers into the chair beside the bed.

Her mind is a mass of dizziness and constantly falling back and forth between delusion and reality. One moment she is in the room, sleeping on Ryan's comfy bed, feeling his unwavering attention all the time, and the next moment she is far, far away from the city, country to their small town, under the sunlight. She is running in a field surrounded by dandelions, searching for Aarav everywhere, calling for him until the sun is no longer illuminating the horizon and dark black clouds loom over her head.

She keeps looking for Aarav and yelling his name. She picks up as many dried puffballs as she can and blows them one after the other wishing for him to come back. It starts raining, followed by thunder and lightning, making her shiver. She looks down at the sagged-up puffballs, and she knows she can't make a wish in the rain. Then she finds herself losing her footing on the muddy ground, but before her knees give up, a set of familiar arms wrap around her, and she instantly finds herself relaxing in their hold. She knows the touch.

"Ryan! You're here?"

"Of course, I'm here. I'm always here. Right by your side."

His words echo in her head.

Shay jolts up from her dream, soaked in sweat and tears. She must be screaming, crying in her sleep because Ryan is there on her side, pulling her trembling, sweaty body to his lap and cradling her, rocking her to calm down. Shay feels so fragile and small in his arms. She has no strength to hold him back. So, she stays silent, seeking comfort from the soothing words he whispers against her hair. After her whimpering dies out, he lays her down on the bed.

She mumbles some incoherent words, still trembling, her insides burning like hellfire. For a few minutes, she is there curled up in the sheets, missing Ryan and his touch. "Ry, don't go." She keeps whimpering until he is back to her side. He wipes her skin with a towel and then changes her into a dry pinstripe shirt. His shaking fingertips make her skin shiver when he opens up the buttons of the sweaty shirt and pulls it off her shoulders.

She is very much aware of exposed skin all of a sudden and gathers enough courage to take a peek at his face. Her mouth gathers up in a weak smile when she finds his eyes closed, his jaw clenched, and he is breathing heavily. "Not a pervert, after all," she says weakly. His lips twitch at the corners as he covers her up in a fresh shirt and buttons up very carefully, eyes still closed, but they open up slowly.

He pulls her collar lightly so that their faces are an inch away and exhales sharply, looking deep into her hazy eyes. "You can always trust me, Shay. You've no idea how much it hurts when I see you in pain. You've no fucking clue."

His forehead falls against her temple and remains there for a very long passing minute until her body wobbles, and falls against his chest. Ryan holds her tighter this time.

The world seems to stay still around them. Shay doesn't know how long she slept against his warm chest. But when she opens her eyes, Ryan is not holding her. Shay turns her head to find him sleeping on the chair beside her bed with his head leaning back and his hands resting loosely on the armrest. She turns to her side and keeps watching him, taking notes on the characteristics that separate him from Aarav.

For starters, his hair has a much messier texture, sharp cut jawline, and high cheekbones are surely distinguishable. His eyes are a much darker shade, almost like black ink, and when he looks at Shay, they seem to turn even darker if possible. But what separates him from any guy she has ever let near her is his touch. It's a mixture of raw passion to wild desire to warm comfort.

God, he is nothing like Aarav but so much more. And that scares her.

She is falling again.

***

AUTHOR'S NOTE

The things are finally falling in place for the final stage of the novel. It's a very descriptive chapter but I wanted raw emotions to come through these two broken souls. Let me know if you feel as strongly as I feel for them.

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Stay safe!