A Peculiar Ailment

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I sighed before reciprocating his gesture. "I care deeply about you too." I smiled. "And I know you're right, we're equals, but we also look out for each other." 

                                                                      ....

From that day on, I no longer went into the castle woods by myself. Which I didn't mind at all. Not only did I feel safer with a companion, I downright happy strolling among the winter trees with Alucard. I knew the paths by heart, even beneath the snows, and once I found a glistening creek where I watched the water trickle past my toes.  We encountered no vampires or night creatures during these walks. However, their hellish cries could be heard at night. I'd often look out at the towards of the distant village of Danesti.

We should help them, but I'm not ready. Soon I'll be strong enough.

"Admiring the stars?" Alucard's gentle voice spoke behind me.

"You can say that." He sat on the balcony beside me, gazing at the Milky Way. "You shouldn't be out here so late." Alucard didn't like me being outside at night since my encounter with Varney, as if he expected the Londoner vamp to swoop down and suck my blood dry. Didn't help that night creature sightings were becoming more frequent, we had a whole museum of staked specimens at our doorstep. Should have been good deterrent, if only the Legions of Hell weren't so stupid.

"I'll head inside if I see anything, even if I can't this'll glow first." I lifted my staff.

"Always the fearless mage." Alucard remarked. "You've become quite the warrior, my angel."

"Thanks, though I'm still not strong enough to kick your butt. I'm getting there." That made him chuckle. "Alucard, are all vampires bloodthirsty and all around nasty?"

"The majority are." He answered. "Not all are as warm and friendly as I am. I'm a rarity among my kind, but I'm also half human."

"Maybe that part's your humanity showing through." I sidled closer, letting Alucard wrap his arms around me and pull me into him. His embrace was abnormally tight and I felt he would've crushed me if I hadn't made a small gasp.

"Forgive me."

"Nothing to forgive." I knew he needed it, so I hugged him back, nuzzling into his shoulder. "My family used to watch the stars up here when I was a child." I felt warm tears drip on my skin. "Father would show me the constellations and how to navigate using the North Star. He'd test me at every season point out their positions in the night sky. Mother would tell the myths of the constellations, she was a women of science but she loved stories."

"I nice you have memories of them." I said. "I wish I got to meet them."

"So do I." Alucard rubbed his thumb on my forehead. "They would have loved you."

"Even Dracula?"

"Yes. Even him. The person he was later in life wasn't the father I had growing up, he was consumed by grief from the death of my mother. It wasn't who he really was." I sensed this was making him uncomfortable and switched topics. "I was wondering about the vampire who scared Varney off. Why did she protect me?"

"I honestly don't know." Alucard murmured concerned. "From what you described, it sounded as if she knew you."

"I believe she did." I nodded. "She said things about me nobody else would know, Varney too. I couldn't have known either of them in my past could I?"

"I should hope not." Alucard said. "It's getting late, we should get inside before the frost drops."

"Good idea." I yawned. Once in my bed I curled up beneath the sheets, looking at the moon over the warded windows. It didn't take long before sleep welcomed me in its embrace.

The next morning I went straight to the infirmary after breakfast. "Is all well?" Alucard asked me. "Yes." I fibbed. "I just wanna refresh my knowledge. You never know when you'll need to treat an ailment." Like I needed to now with my gurgling stomach.

It wasn't just my stomach either, for months I'd been getting these pulsating heat sensations deep in my chest that rise like volcanic magma throughout my body, stinging my cheeks red and making me all around antsy. My emotions went topsy turvy whenever these episodes happened, my brain dizzy with a flurry of giddiness and anxiety in a calamitous clusterbomb. Surely there had to be an explanation for this somewhere in these books!

There was information, a lot of it. Ranging from simple stomach aches to ulcers to heart attacks and malarial fever! I had to put the books down else I would've frazzed myself out.

"There's gotta be a reason." I murmured, powerwalking to the Library. "Maybe it's a simple sickness I can treat." Once inside I summoned a Bookkeeper. "I need to see the Librarian, please." The Bookkeeper led me to his master.

I found spectral night creature organizing old scrolls. "You seek my knowledge?" He asked with a soft hoot.

"Yes, big time." I said riddled with nerves. "I think I might be sick. I have heat that flares up in my chest that makes my cheeks flush, but it's not a fever. I get this sloshy gurgling sensation in my stomach, but I didn't eat anything spoiled, and the worst thing is whenever this happens my brain gets all fuzzy, l feel many different things at once!"

"That is quite an array of symptoms." The Library flickered his eyes. "Tell me, do these symptoms occurs in Lord Adrian's presence?"

"Alucard!?" I blinked. "Yes! Every damn time." I gasped and covered my mouth in horror. "Oh my God, he's cast some freakish vampire hex over me!! Without even knowing! I HOPE without even knowing! No! Alucard wouldn't do that!!"

"It is not a vampire hex." The Librarian responded plainly. "But he is the source of this troubling condition."

"If it's not a vampire thing what is it?" I asked desperately. "What is he doing to me? How's it happening? Do I need to tell him? I should."

"Be at ease." The Librarian clicked his beak. "What has possessed you has possessed mankind since their emergence from Eden. It has created families and destroyed them, caused empires to topple, lives to be lost, and lives to be born. Humans and vampires have killed for it, have lied and schemed for it. It stirs a fearlessness in their souls they wouldn't ordinarily posses. It is the source of the very state of our world."

"Please stop being poetic ." I shrugged. "I need a straightforward answer: What is wrong with me?"

" Nothing is wrong with you." The Librarian peered directly into my gaze, his glowing eyes wistful for a life long passed. "My dear, you are in love."

"What!?" I shrieked in disbelief. "That's impossible!"

"And why do you say that?" He inquired.

"Because this isn't what love is supposed to feel like. It shouldn't feel like a giant clusterfuck in my brain and body. It is messing me up."

"That's exactly what it feels like." The Librarian hooted. "I was human once. I remember falling in love like a fading dream. In time the storm will calm and your feelings will make more sense to you."

"What will happen from this?"

"That's the question isn't it?" The Librarian cocked his feathers. "What your feeling is a gift, never take it for granted like I once did." He vanished like a ghost from my presence.

"Of course he vanishes." I rolled my eyes. "I can't believe this. I'm in love." Giddiness bubbled in my gut like Champaign, but now I knew the reason. " It makes sense now. I'm in love with Alucard."

What was I going to do with it?

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