I'm Sorry. Bakugou Angst

Chapter 1

Bakugou's POV:

I groan as I wake up to the old hag calling me.

"Katsuki! You're about to sleep in, hurry up!" I hear my mom scream again. Shit it's Monday. I roll out of bed stumbling to the washroom. I pull on my uniform not bothering with the tie and comb my hair. Walking out of my room I grab my backpack and head to the door hoping the old hag wouldn't question it. But of course she did.

"Your not going to eat anything Katsuki?" She asks peeking out of the kitchen. "Not hungry." I mumble. Truth be told I was probably starving but every time I eat I always feel the need to throw it up. It's like a punishment for myself I guess. For always cursing and yelling at people for no good reason. Especially for saying those things to Deku.

'Go take a swan dive off the roof of the building!'

Those words replay in my head over and over again. Gritting my teeth I quickly leave the house and start walking to school. Damn it! I start walking faster and faster.

"Hey Bakubro!" I hear Kirishima call. I look up and realized I already reached the school. "What do you want shitty hair?"
I yell not looking back. "Hey! We have the same hair you know!" Kirishima yells catching up to me. "Tch." We walk to class as I tune out Kirishima's talking and plop down in my chair. The bell rings and my classmates flood into the classroom talking and taking their seats.

Mr. Aizawa comes in and starts teaching, as usual I look out the window and tune him out. I always I liked watching sunsets, ever since I was small too. But I also liked the daytime, especially when there are clouds. It seemed so peaceful and nice how they drifted without a care in the world.

I suddenly realize how tired I was, I barely got any sleep the other night. I was woken up at 2 in the morning and couldn't sleep after. I wish I wasn't so weak. I ended the career of All Might. I already know everyone hates me for it. I have a 'villian' type personality. A small smile creeps onto my face. I should just let this act drop. But I worked hard to keep these walls up and I'm not about to just let them break.

Before I knew it the bell had rung again. Walking out the room Denki and Kirishima run up to me.

"Hey Bakubro!" Denki calls as they approach me. "What do you want dunce face?" I say turning around. "We just wanted to know if you wanted to join us for lunch!" He said smiling. "Not hungry." I reply and walk off. "But Bakugou!" I hear Kirishima call, "You never eat lunch with us, cmon please?" I groan and turn back around. "Alright find shitty hair, but this is the only time I'm doing this!" I say walking pass them to the cafeteria, tuning them out. Damn it, why did I accept it? I'm just going to throw it up again. I don't deserve to eat! Can't they see that?!

"Yo Bakubro, you alright? You look mad. Like angry!" Denki laughs. "Shut up dunce face." I growl, taking the tray and sitting down. "Hey Bakubabe! Are you joining us for lunch today?!" Mina asks excitingly. "Tch, yeah yeah don't let it get to your head Mina." I reply, not having energy to scream. "Woah! Did you just call Mina by her name Bakubro?" Denki says bewildered.

"YES!!" Mina yells happily, "Pay up suckers! I just got Bakubabe to call me by my name first!" She says practically glowing with happiness. They all groan and pass Mina there money.

I tune them out once more and stare at the food. No way I'm gonna eat. I'm just gonna throw it up again anyways there's no point. "You gonna eat Bakubro? You've just been staring at your food." Kirishima says looking a little bit worried. Curse you shitty hair, you wouldn't understand! "Piss off Kirishima. I'm not hungry." I say angrily. "Oh, erm, okay I guess." He says digging into his food.

My, my Katsuki. Your such a fuck up. You got mad at him even though he was just worried for you! You don't even deserve to be a hero. Damn it. Not now go away! Fuck off. You really think you deserve to be left alone though? You know you deserve it Bakugou. I quickly stand up, gritting my teeth. "Bakubro? You alright?" Denki asks. Before anyone could ask anything I rush out of there trying to get the voice out of my head.

Not now, not now! Please just go away! I run the the washroom, suddenly overcome with sickness. Damn it! Why now? Why can't I hold it back?! I think as I viciously vomit into the toilet.

After a few minuets I flush the toilet and stumble out of the bathroom stall. I wash my hands and quickly shuffle to my dorm room.

Cmon Katsuki. You know you want to.. No. No I don't. Fuck off! Stop bothering me! You've been thinking about it. Just do it. Your weak, useless, you can never become a hero. Please! Stop it! Leave me alone!! I collapse onto the bed as warm tears slip down my cheeks. If you just do it, just one cut..I'll leave you alone for the rest of they day.

Damn it. I reach into my drawer and pull out a razor. I press it against my skin and drag it along my arm. It felt good. I did it again, and again, and again until my arms were a bloody mess. Their finally gone.

I walk into the bathroom to clean my cuts. I grab a rag and wet it with warm water. I hiss in pain as I wash the blood off. I reach into the cabinet and get some bandages to wrap my arm in. After wrapping my arms, I walk to bed slumping down exhausted.

Shit. I forgot I had to make dinner for those nerds. I always cook for everyone since I'm the only one who knows how to cook. I enjoy cooking, it takes my mind off things.

Groaning I get out of bed and throw on a black hoodie, making my way downstairs. I walk into the kitchen to be greeted by Deku.

"Oh! Kacchan! Are you making dinner?" He smiles sweetly. Damn it. How can he be so kind to someone who told them to kill themselves?! "Yeah so what?" I say voice straining. Deku looks at me a little surprised but quickly recovers. "O-oh, haha nothing. Uhm- I guess I'll get out of your way, let me know when it's done Kacchan!" He stutters and walks out of the kitchen.

After Cooking Dinner

"Dinners ready!" I yell walking out of the kitchen when I hear someone call my name.

"Your not gonna eat Bakugou?" Kirishima asks clearly a little bit worried for me. "I'm not hungry, plus I already ate a little." I lie hoping he'd buy it and leave me alone. "Oh okay!" He smiles walking past me. I let out a sigh of relief. I can finally get some sleep. Walking back into my room, I fall onto the bed and immediately fall asleep.

Kirishima's POV:

Man I'm getting kind of worried for Bakugou. Not that I don't think he's strong and manly, but I've never seen him eat before. He's been getting really pale and it's like he doesn't have any energy.

Not to mention he was acting differently today. He wasn't as fierce and angry today. I also feel like somethings wrong, since last week too. Now that I'm thinking about it, he also called me by my name during lunch too!

Though nobody noticed. Somethings up but knowing Bakugou, he probably won't spill. I'll have to as Midoriya if he noticed it too, but he's already went to bed so I'll have to ask him tomorrow.I should probably get some rest too.