jerrie one shots to cure my delusional mind

Misery

Jade's POV

I don't even know how long it's been. I stopped counting the days after a while. All I know is that it's been hell.

Perrie broke up with me around autumn time. She explained that it was best for the band and that we would be a lot better as friends. Being the idiot I am, I never fought for her. That's one of my biggest regrets.

Around a month or two ago, I started to properly look back at our relationship. Whilst it had its good moments, I easily sought out the worse side. She would be so distant with me, and me with her.

It made me yearn to relive it all. As I read through old text messages, I began to regret things I didn't say. I should've spoke to her more. Should've considered things she was going through. But now I can't say the things she deserves to hear. It's too late.

Another thing that doesn't help is Jesy. Ever since she left, she's changed so much. Toxic. The only word I can use to describe my former friend. She no longer speaks to me or Leigh-Anne- but rather to Perrie. Her phone is always ringing with calls from Jesy, asking how Hatchi and Travis are and when she's going to find a girlfriend.

But anyway, present time.

The band has become so distant. It's practically split in half, with Leigh-Anne supporting me, and Jesy on Perrie's side. Rehearsals have more tension than ever before, and I can't tear my eyes away from Perrie. She's just so perfect.

Except she's not.

Except she is.

It's so complicated and bad for me but I can't bring myself to stop loving her.

It's like a drug. So bad for me, yet so addictive.

The looks she gives me during these rehearsals are so empty- not an ounce of emotion behind those hypnotising blue eyes.

Still, it manages to fill me with some form of hope.