Legacy // H.S

18.

'Tell me something that I'll forget

And you might have to tell me again'

*

In two days, we will be stealing three of the most famous portraits of British monarchs in history. In two days, I get to participate in something that will go down in history. In two days, our lives change.

Because it is not the art that we care about, but the promise of what this heist will bring. It is a transaction, something to guarantee the support and assistance of Claude and his people in our own endeavours, and finally confirming that our robbery will happen after years of trials and tribulations, growth and loss. Harry's team have been preparing for that moment far longer than I have, but after spending almost a year researching and creating and learning, I can feel the weight of its importance too. We may have one of the diamonds already, and it may have come into our possession in a somewhat easier fashion, but only after we steal from the Portrait Gallery will the rest finally feel obtainable.

The nerves are high as a result. This week, we've all been pacing back and forth, going over every single detail as if they've not already been permanently inked into our brains. We've practised for hours on end, surveyed the maps, and watched every angle of the gallery through the cameras. It's finally time, and we know we're ready, but something about stealing will always bring a rush of adrenaline to one's body. Even Claude, who has been doing this longer than any of us, has been jittery, bouncing on the balls of his feet whenever he needs a moment to realign his thoughts.

And I'm also incredibly excited. Despite agreeing to join the team all those months ago, I didn't expect to actually find myself enjoying what I was set to be a part of. But with each day that passes, I seem to find myself high on the risk of it all. Knowing that something could go wrong, that there could be a dagger waiting to pierce our hearts from a shadow around a corner; it's exhilarating. We are completely in control, but the prospect of losing it is just as enticing.

I'm not sure why I've come to enjoy such danger. I suppose I always have. But not just any kind. I've been through my fair share of it, and I have the physical and mental scars to show for it; many that may never heal because of how deep the cuts were. I like the kind of danger that you can manipulate, the kind you lead, the kind you know you can escape. Testing my limits, but in my own time. Maybe it was my way of healing, maybe it was a result of losing so much from such a young age. I don't know. I don't think I ever will.

Perhaps if I sit with a therapist and talk it through, they'd be able to get to the bottom of it. I hardly have time for that, though. I suspect there will be a lot of therapy due if we ever make it through the next few months.

It's just Harry and I in the house tonight. Belly finally went home to spend some time with her mother, and to stay out of London while we go through with the heist. It's not safe for her or her child to be so near when this is going on but given how close she is to both Liam and I now, I don't want a target placed on her back. Liam almost tried to go with her, but Claude had to give him a stern talking to. He's been a lot quieter since.

I've asked her what's going on between the two of them. She insists he's just helping her, that he's doing things she can't when she's too tired or anxious. I know she's understating it, though. Their eyes seem to always search for one another when the other leaves the room, but the moment they appear, a subtle calmness settles over their features, like a breath has finally been released. Perhaps she's relying on him too much, and perhaps he has become too attached, but I don't see the harm in it. Not if it makes them happy.

We could all use a bit of happiness at the moment.

Toby's family reached out to Belly, asking if she'd heard from him at all in the past few weeks. She told them they'd split a month or so ago, citing his infidelity and disagreements. Said she hadn't seen him, and he certainly hadn't tried to be a father to their child. But she did plant a seed; a story that he mentioned he was travelling to the States for work after being recruited to join a bigger case. She said she wasn't sure if he was lying again, another ruse to see his mistress, but he could just be out there, avoiding them like he avoids his responsibilities. Claude said the body had been disposed of in a location that couldn't be found, and if it somehow were, nothing would tie it to them.