The Beginning

Ch. 39 - The premiere

In the weeks that led up to the premiere, she'd regained her confidence, having settled on a script she felt passionate about, a rom-com entitled While You Were Sleeping. Her calendar started to fill up with interviews and TV spots to promote the release of Speed, which had been bumped up after test audiences responded so favorably to it. Tasting the green that comes with a successful film, the studio was putting more energy into promotions and advertisements. She'd grown more comfortable and relaxed discussing her experiences, whether on Inside Edition or sitting at David Letterman's desk. She was back to her flirtatious, charismatic self, having convinced herself that all of that was in the past. She had Nathan by her side, anyway, who was waiting downstairs to take her to the premiere with her sister since he was in-between projects at the moment.

With one last look at her reflection, she took a big breath, counted to four then turned to head down the stairs where her sister and Nathan were waiting.

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She smiles when she sees him, dressed in an oversized blazer and chinos. There is an ease about Nathan, as he stands there in the living room, watching the Angels play the Marlins on TV. She knows what to expect with him, life is predictable. She walks up to him and squeezes his hand, planting a kiss on his cheek. "Look at you all cleaned up," she says, gently tousling his hair.

"Thanks, babe," he tosses out, eyes darting briefly in her direction as he speaks. "Hey-ey-ey, watch the hair!"

"Sorry, sorry," she laughs, turning her attention to Gesine. "Hey pretty lady!"

"Me? You look amazing! You ready for this?" Gesine asks as they hug.

Sandra grabs Nathan's hand as the three walk outside to their waiting studio car. She hasn't quite gotten used to this car and driver thing yet. Nathan opens the door and Sandra slides in to find Nathan's friend, Aaron, already leaning back, sipping on a rum and coke. Confused, she turns back to Nathan.

"Oh yeah. Babe, I thought you'd be cool if Aaron came, you know, so I had someone to hang out with when you're doing all the schmoozing and stuff. You don't mind, do you?"

Gesine is the only one that notices the grimace on Sandra's face as she assures Nathan it's fine. She is the only one who notices Nathan stepping on Sandra's toes when he squeezes past her to sit next to Aaron and talk about the strikeout the Angels just had against the Marlins. She is the only one that notices the usually talkative Sandra sitting quietly, chin in hand, in a fancy stretch limousine sent to escort her to the premiere for her biggest role yet. And she is the only one who sees the dull look in her eyes as she reaches across and squeezes Sandra's knee, mouthing that she loves her and is proud of her.

They arrive at Mann's Chinese Theatre on Hollywood Boulevard. Gesine is the first to slide out when the driver opens their door, followed by Sandra, then Nathan and Aaron. Gesine turns to brush Sandra's hair out of her face and embrace her one last time, whispering again in her ear how proud she is of her. Sandra turns in Nathan's direction to find him and Aaron already slapping hands and chatting with other industry folks in attendance. She moves toward him, but is interrupted by a publicist for the film, who firmly grasps her wrist and ushers her away.

The whirlwind of the premiere is starting.

Blinded by flashing bulbs and disembodied voices calling her name from every direction, she is led down the red carpet to start some interviews. The thumping of her heart in her ears is matched only by the clicking of the cameras. She feels overheated and short of breath, peering into the sea of wall-to-wall faces for a friendly set of eyes to peer back at her. She is sure she'll be swallowed up by the chaos when a large hand lands on the small of her back, once more finding that gap between the waist of her skirt and the bottom of her shirt.