Kamukoma one-shots + headcanons

I hate you..

I love Servant and the despair arc sm💖
Tw: suicide
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"Maybe I should kill myself.. no no.."

Servant stood on top of a almost crumbling building while staring off into the distance, "there's no one here to tell me what to do.. I don't know what to do.." he rubbed his face and sighed heavily as he jumped off the building, it wasn't too high to kill him as he landed on his feet and began walking slowly. It seemed so cold even though the sun was high in the sky.. and it was almost criminal that Servant wasn't being commanded to do anything.. he had no one.

"Nagito Komaeda!" He heard someone shout as he turned he saw it was Toko Fukawa, he sighed and turned to face her. "Servant.." he heard a weak voice say, he turned and saw the Warriors so he looked away pathetically. "Seravnt! There you are!" He turned again to see the Rements of Despair watching him, he whimpered softly at the noise and kept his head down, "he's coming with us!" He heard Akane say but then he felt a tug at his sweater, "no way! He's our Servant!" Kotoko shouted towards them. They continued to argue until Servant couldn't take it anymore, "would you all just shut up..?" He mumbled and they all saw the murderous intent in his eyes, "I don't belong to any of you.." he said as he held the collar around his neck with his other hand twisting around to the lock on the back and with the twist of a key.. his collar fell.

He dropped the key and pulled a gun out of his pocket while giggling softly, "god.. this is so pointless.." he uttered as he placed the weapon to his temple.. the fear in his eyes was so clear but was clouded over by murder.. a loud bang echoed throughout everyone's ears as the loud sobs of the Warriors screamed out, they barely drowned out the ringing in their ears, "Servant..?" Kotoko uttered with tears in her eyes as she sat on her knees and placed her face on his stomach as loud cries were muffled by his clothing. "Wake up.. you idiot.." she mumbled, "Nagito.. please wake up.. you're so cold.." she sniffled, "don't leave me too.. I've lost everything.. I can't lose you too.." she cried out again as the other Warriors surrounded him while crying pathetic tears as the Future Foundation started pouring in to collect and potentially save Servants life. "Stay away from him.." Nagisa mumbled as he clung to him but Monaca shook her head at him, "please.. take me with him.." Kotoko cried out as the Future Foundation allowed them all to follow along with them as they all glared at the Rements of Despair as they were taken away.

"Kamukura.. he shot himself.. we don't know if he survived.."

Komaeda opened his eyes slowly and saw all the other eyes on him, "Ser- Nagito! You're awake!" Kotoko said as she hugged him softly, Komeada's eyes still seemed so lifeless and unfocused. He didn't say anything and once Kotoko let him go he laid back down before pulling the blanket over his head, he couldn't face them.. not now. He heard the door open and feet quickly leaving and other people entering, "Nagito?" He heard a males voice say as he sat up and glared slightly at the three other people in his room. "Naegi.. Togami.. Kirigiri.. what do you want..?" He spoke slow and softly, his gaze faced away from them.. he wasn't in the mood for talking, "well we need to know the location of Izuru Kamukura.." Naegi started but Komaeda was quick to stop him with a raised hand.. "I'm not telling you anything.. I'm sorry but I can't.." he pulled his knees to his chest as he spoke calmly, almost too calm for comfort.

"Why not?" Togami asked with a slight snobby tone which made Komaeda 'tch' softly to himself, "it's for personal and safety reasons.. I'm not putting Kamukura in danger for you.." he mumbled but then Togami scowled at him, "shouldn't you be more worried about yourself?" He asked with a click of his tongue. "Well isn't it obvious..? I did shoot myself in the head.. I would never ever tell you where Kamukura is.." he snapped back, his words felt icy and cold as he glared with such hatred. "So loyal.. you really are a dog.." he taunted back but he noticed that Komaeda froze as his eyes unfocused and focused, he soon turned on his side while curling in on himself. "Get out.." his voice seemed so soft and slightly stuttering as he spoke.. something set that off and it made Togami smirk in satisfaction as he continued, "oh come on.. the loyal dog doesn't want to talk..? Too bad, guess we'll just kill his master.." he noticed how Komaeda started to shake and small, almost silent, noises came from his mouth.

'Get out of my head, Get out of my head, Get out of my head, Get out of my head, Get out of my head, Get out of my head, Get out of my head, Get out of my head, Get out of my head, Get out of my head, Get out of my head, Get out of my head, Get out of my head, Get out of my head, Get out of my head, Get out of my head,Get out of my head!'

"I'll be a good S-Servant.. I swear.. please don't put me back outside.. it's so scary out there.. lady Junko please don't do it again.. you know what they'll do too me.." Komaeda covered his face as he kept mumbling to a nonexistent Junko.. he could still see, feel and smell her.. she never left.. he flinched when he felt a hand on his back, he was scared.. he didn't know what to feel. When he turned he saw Kamukura standing over him, he felt tears come to his eyes as he sat up and touched the others face.. "it's you.. you came here..?" He mumbled to him as he pressed his face into Kamukura's neck and wrapped his arms around his torso, he pulled his head away and held the others face in his hands.

"I'm sorry.."

He leaned in and connected his lips to Kamukura's as the other did the same, it was a tender moment of pure happiness and hope that the future could be better.. for the both of them..

"It's alright.."