"Till the end of time"-malec x oc

chapter 52

"Let me talk to Lydia." i say slowly turning around looking at them.

"If you accuse Alec's fiancée of treason, you will ruin whatever relationship you have left with him."clary says seriously making me look at her my face dropping when i realise she might be right.

"Clary's right, gracie. If Lydia did this, she might not be so defensive with her"jace speaks making me sigh looking at him.

"please just let me do this....let me help" i say slowly looking between them." i havent done anything since we arrived" i say looking between all of them despertely."She might let her guard down. Slip up." i say seriously looking at them/

they all look at me before sighing.

"Fine" clary sighs pulling me in for a hug making me hug her back.

"but i want to know everything she says"jace speaks as i pull away from clary, i nod back at him taking a deep breath.

after getting a glass of water calming myself down enough to speak to lydia and not freak out or punch her. i walk slowly towards alecs office where apparently she has taken over,.

i stand in the doorway a fake smile on my face as the women holding her dress walks past.

"your dress...its stunning" i say looking at it as she passes.

 i look up at lydia as she stands in the middle of the room in a robe.

she frowns at me, im the last person she would probably be expecting to see.

"thank you" she speaks senidng me a small confused smile,"I feel more nervous wearing that dress than I ever have on the battlefield." she mutters nervously walking over to the desk.

 i smile and walk more in to the room;

"I think that's pretty normal." i say stepping into the room looking around.

"Lydia, I need to talk to you about something" i mutter before turning around slwoly looking at her.

"if this is about alec-" she goes to say quikly making me shake my head.

"no...its umm...its not" i say stuttering at the sound of his name being mentioned.

"What is it?" she asks confused looking at me.

"Valentine sent a Shax demon to track us on our mission today. It killed Ragnor Fell." i explains making her eyes widen.

"By the Angel..." she mutters looking down.

"Only a few people here at the Institute even knew we were going on the mission. You overheard us this morning. Then we were attacked." i tell her seriously making her quickly snap and look at me.

"If I was working for Valentine, don't you think I would have already given him the Mortal Cup?" she scoffs shaking her head at me."I don't believe this. Fellow Shadowhunters accusing me of high treason....i knew you were jelous but this is crazy" she speaks pushing herself away from the desk.

 i scoff become more angry than upset with her.

"Lydia, I'm not accusing you of anything and this has absolutely nothing to do with alec" i tell her seriously shaking my head.

"Of course it does. he doesnt want you and Unless you have hard evidence to back your claims, I believe this conversation is over." she speaks glaring at me making my chest hurt at the mention of alec not wanting me.

"Fine, but know this. These people have become like family to me... and I protect my family."i tell her slwoly walking over to her looking into her eyes the whole time.

"I care about them too. Why else would I be marrying Alec?" she asks tilting her head at him.

"How well do you actually know him?" i ask her slowly making her shake my head.

"You're talking about Alec's feelings for Magnus?" she asks me making my mouth open slightly."I'm not blind." she speaks smirking at me making me step back

"If... if you're not in love with Alec, then why are you going through with this marriage?" i ask her tears appearing in my eyes.

"Alec's love for his family and his desire to restore the Lightwood name has touched me in ways that I haven't felt in a very long time. Alec is a man of honor... and I truly care about him." she explains walking towards me making me step back

"But what about Alec's happiness?" i ask her my voice breaking slightly.

"Shadowhunters know that our duty to our family supersedes our personal desires." she speaks before sighing."Look, I know that you're still new to this world and our traditions may seem foreign to you, but I..-" she says slwoly holding a hand out but i scoff turning around crossing my eyes quickily wiping the tears away.

"eah, more like ice cold." i say before truning glaring at her."Alec should not have to give up who he is, or at least the chance to figure it out, just to please his family." i say looking at her like she is crazy.

"But Alec proposed to me. This is what he wants." she says breaking my heart again.

i take a deep breath looking down composing myself before looking up at her again.

"How do I trust you?" i ask her quietly staring into her eyes.

"You're Valentine's daughter... and I learned to trust you." she shurgs making me shake my head. i stare at her once more before leaving.

quickly passing clary who was stood behind the corner in case things went side way.

i rush past her and into my room once again with eyes filled with tears,