Lust - Victoria

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The two hours passed as slow as I had hoped they wouldn't. We were talking about the movie, about topics, about possible scenes. I was forced to stop thinking about her. I wrote down everything the boys told me- Thomas had returned just minutes after following Victoria by shaking his head. She wouldn't come back.

"I think that's it for today", Damiano said, clapping his hands together in his lap. I nodded and collected the countless papers, all of them written on both sides.

"If there's anything you have to tell me before tomorrow, you have my email", I assured them and then hugged each of them in the same way we had at the beginning of the meeting. Some more empty phrases and I was out of the door. I closed my eyes in exhaustion and leaned my back against the wood.

"You should be thankful, getting to work with us." I immediately teared my eyes open. There she was, leaning against the door frame opposite of me. Victoria. She looked just as breathtaking as when I first saw her.

"Who said I wasn't?", I finally managed to answer. Her voice was low and raspy, not at all what I had expected. In some way it suited her better than what I imagined. She scoffed, pulling her eyebrow up.

"I don't know, what gave it away, maybe your joie de vivre?", she said ironically while rolling her eyes. I didn't mind that she was mocking me. I did mind that she didn't like me.

"Why did you leave?", I asked bluntly and crossed my arms in front of my chest. I couldn't possibly imagine where I had gotten that rush of confidence from. She looked at me for a moment and then shook her head.

"This is ridiculous, why am I even talking to you?" Then she turned back into the room and closed the door behind her. I let out the breath I hadn't realised I was holding and tried to get my heartbeat under control. I longed for her to come back, longed for her presence, to hear her voice, to smell her perfume. Why did she hate me so much?

At home, I was still thinking about our strange encounter. I didn't pick up any of Dola's multiple calls, but instead sat down and began to draw. Her eyes first, then her perfectly straight nose, her curved lips. I drew just her face, yet she looked complete as she was.

After an hour my head began to spin and I got up. I knew I had to get some work done before tomorrow, but I couldn't concentrate. Victoria.

I found myself sitting down on the sofa with a cup of tea warming my clammy fingers. Without thinking much about it, I opened Instagram and typed in the band's name. It didn't take too long until I found a picture where she was tagged in. De Angelis. She really was an angel.

The next time I looked at the time, I had reached the first of her posts. 2AM. What had I done all that time? I couldn't even remember, my head was full of that gorgeous girl. My tea had went cold so I threw the remains in the sink. Victoria.

Victoria. That's who I dreamed about that following night on the couch. When I woke up, I was sweating. I've never had that sort of dream before, I didn't like it. As fast as I could, I got in my room to change my underwear, then took my time to pick out the clothes for the day.

Now that I knew what type of atmosphere I was getting into, I was able to choose a proper outfit. In the end, I settled for a white suit over a silver blouse with a small bow at the front. I wasn't too sure about the neckline which could have been considered too low but I didn't have the time to change again. Fortunately, the not having to collect my materials because I had never touched them in the first place, saved me some.

I took a taxi there, so I wouldn't have to talk to Dola about it again and I missed the bus already.

Arriving there, I hurried up the stairs, files in one hand, coffee in the other, trying to avoid the lady from last time. She just had that thing about her, I couldn't name.

I managed to get to the door without bumping into the woman and didn't lose any time either to knock and open the door. To my disappointment I couldn't find Victoria in the room.

The boys sat on different places as the last time, which left me struggling with matching their names to their faces.

"Hiii, Ameya!", the blonde boy grinned and did a little dance towards me before hugging me. I hugged him back, as well as the other two- of course, without greeting them by their names. They didn't seem to notice.

"I assume Victoria isn't coming?", I had to ask. The boy with the many tattoos looked down begrudgingly and the long haired boy spoke for the first time more than just a few words. His english was quite good, I didn't see his reason for his insecurity he had told me about in the beginning.

"I do not think Vic is with us", he said and Damiano added something quickly: "She told us she'd trust us with the planning and just join for the shooting, as long as we kept her updated. We agreed."

I looked down, hoping to hide my flushed red cheeks. I wouldn't be there for the filming anymore. I may never see beautiful Victoria again. I'd rather see her hate me than not at all.

"Okay", I pressed out and sat down at the spot she had been the first time I saw her. The next hours I improvised some results, which they seemed to accept. We worked together on some more ideas and got further into detail. 

This time it went by faster; before I knew it, I was back outside the building, having successfully dodged the management lady. Not to miss the last bus, I began to run down the street, crashing right into a male body. He groaned sweared, shouting at me, but I just kneeled down to collect the papers I had dropped. God how I hated people sometimes.

The man kept on walking, leaving me alone in the street. I sighed and got back up to check if I had any files left on the ground. When I turned around to go sure, my eyes met these blue ocean ones I had missed the whole day. Victoria was standing behind one of the windows in the building front. I knew she had been watching me.

The moment I looked at her, she turned away and closed the curtains. I stared into that direction for a little longer, totally caught off guard. I wasn't able to interpret the look she had on her face, it was too short. Had I just imagined it? Was I starting to see things that weren't there? That day I didn't take the bus, I was walking home.