(syon)
"i met him again," i smiled.
"who? pierre?" / "what happened?"
i looked at my brother, "save, i never dreamed about the accident. i always dreamed about him."
they were all just listening to me speak.
"i always dreamed about giving him lilies. i can always see him through the nights i am longing for him. but the nightmare behind those dreams was he can't see me. he never saw me because i caged him there." i have to swallow the lump in my throat so i paused. "i was leaning so much to him when he was still alive i forgot that he can never be mine. we're different people. we could sleep in the same bed but we should always dream different. i can always dream different but i never let go of him."
"sy, breathe for awhile. you are not crying pero kanina mo pa pinipigilang huminga," inabutan ako ni breme ng tubig. i almost emptied the glass.
i cleared my throat and assured them i'm okay with a thumbs up. i looked at my hand. the ring was not there.
"it fell under the bed," seth said. "your ring ba? yea, it fell."
"i let go of pierre na," hinaplos ko ang daliri kung saan nagmarka na ang singsing na suot ko nang ilang taon. "hindi ko na ulit siya mapapanaginipan. i left my love already."
"syon..."
"i'm walking away from him na, mien." i smiled. this time, it was the smile that shouts finally. they embraced me. no one was crying because of pain but pure happiness. i'm proud of myself.
"babalik ka na ng kumpanya?" tanong ni farrell.
umiling ako, "i believed you guys have a very efficient corporate manager there already." lumaki ang ngiti ni save sa narinig. "besides, masaya magturo sa village."
"i never knew you had the patience to teach kids, syon." qrst.
"kasi napipigtas lagi ang pisi ng pasensya niya," umirap si breme. "bitinin mo lang sandali sa chismis, nasermonan ka na. tsh, suplado."
"so magbabakasyon ka lang? for how long?" seth.
"hindi ka talaga babalik sa company? may posisyon pa," mien looked at save. "hindi naman yung sa'yo, save. your brother can start as a janitor."
"i'm good as a volunteer teacher. masayang maging favorite teacher ng mga bata sa village." i said proudly.
farrell touched his chin, "why do i get this feeling you have a love interest there? are you really talking about the kids?"
"what the heck, farrell. of course, i have a love interest there. love gives us the choice and chance to stay. that's why i like staying there. and yes, it's the kids and the people."
"should we visit him?"
and now, we're here in front of him. his tomb.
"pierre, i hope you understand na ngayon lang kami nakumpleto." qrst started. "well, i know you do."
"for the past years, sy, paisa-isa ang pagbisita namin. we're busy, pierre. so much that we didn't notice we were growing," mien added.
"you must be so proud of us, pierre." seth, "especially to syon."
"mahaba na ang pasensya niya," singit ni breme.
i said, "we miss you, pierre. i've been missing you."
they tapped my shoulder, "we'll wait in the car. you need time alone."
