twenty-four

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As much as Charlotte loved James, she wished her marriage to him did not mean she was taken away from her best friend

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As much as Charlotte loved James, she wished her marriage to him did not mean she was taken away from her best friend.

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Vanessa reluctantly found herself visiting Charlotte at Bridgerton House to help her prepare for her upcoming wedding, which was in 3 days. As terrible as she felt emotionally and mentally, she couldn't bring herself to stay away from her best friend in the last few moments they might have together before she left on her month long honeymoon. But Vanessa was desperately hoping that Miles would not be at his father's home.

So there she sat in the drawing room with Charlotte, discussing various topics about her wedding. Vanessa tried her best to keep up with Charlotte's chatter, but she could not keep her mind from wandering. She just felt so drained, and tired, and sad. But she had no one to blame but herself.

"Nessa? Did you hear me?" Charlotte placed a hand on Vanessa's shoulder as they sat together on the sofa. 

"I'm sorry, I stopped listening." Vanessa admitted while shaking her head. 

"Oh." Charlotte tilted her head and examined Vanessa for a moment. She frowned. "Nessa, you don't seem like yourself. And to be frank, you haven't seemed like yourself for the past week."

Charlotte reached for Vanessa's hand in comfort, "What is wrong? You look so melancholy, which is such a rare sight." 

"It is nothing, Charlotte. Thank you for noticing, but it will pass. I will be back to my usual self in no time." Vanessa squeezed her hand in thanks.

"So you are melancholy? You didn't deny it." Charlotte began to sound very worried, and even a little guilty. 

Vanessa didn't know what to say, instead she smiled at her friend weakly. 

Charlotte looked away from her and sighed deeply. "It's my fault isn't it?" Vanessa could hear that Charlotte was about ready to cry. "I've made you feel like this because I'm getting married."

"What? Charlotte that's not at all-" 

"But it is! Don't lie to me. You probably think I'm leaving you just as Violet did when she got married." Charlotte gasped and her eyes began to water. "Oh my goodness, I've rarely even been spending time with you ever since I got engaged. I'm so sorry, Nessa."

Vanessa stared at her friend in shock. A part of what she said was true. Vanessa did have rather negative thoughts about the fact that Charlotte was getting married, but it certainly was not the reason for her sadness. She just never really thought that Charlotte would be feeling guilty about it this whole time. And now, her dear friend was in tears over her guilt.

"You'll be by yourself more often than ever. I'm so sorry..." Charlotte sobbed and Vanessa handed her a handkerchief before pulling her in for a hug. 

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