The Runaways: Book 1 of the The White Goddess Series

30. Secrets

Fallon ran an anxious eye across the living room. The decorative pillows were plumped, the carpet freshly vacuumed, and the windows were gleaming and smudge-free. She'd cleaned the house top to bottom building up the nerve to open that damn box today.

"It's not too late to cancel," Jackson murmured, pressing a glass of wine into her hand. She knew he didn't understand her rush to speak to the Alpha and Luna tonight. Same with the boys. It was old news and tragic as it was, had no impact on their daily lives. Why did they need to be told right now?

He didn't get it, because he didn't know everything. Because Fallon hadn't told him everything. Because she could barely wrap her brain around it all. There was no way she could tell this story multiple times. 

Fallon took a grateful sip of wine. "Yes it is." She tried to keep her voice light. "They'll be here any minute."

"So take your glass upstairs, run a bath, light some candles..." Jackson moved his lips to her ear. "...Rub one out...whatever it takes. I can fill in Blake and Riley when they get here."

No you can't. Fallon hid her guilt behind another swallow of wine. It felt so wrong keeping secrets from her mate, even for a few hours. Never mind the secrets she'd been keeping for years.

Until now.

Fallon shifted her gaze to the boys, eyeing her warily over their card game at the dining room table. A rush of love for them straightened her spine with determination. It wasn't going to be easy, revealing herself, going against the habits of a lifetime. But this shit ended now. 

There wasn't going to be another generation of silence and secrecy. 

"You're sweet." She used her free hand to smooth the front of Jackson's shirt. "But I need to do this."

Jackson trapped her hand under his against his chest. "But why?" He frowned, his eyes searching hers. "What aren't you telling me?"

"I can't. I'm sorry." Fallon lowered her gaze to the strong, calloused hand covering hers. "I'll tell you everything but...I can't say it more than once." She peeked up in time to see a flash of hurt cross his face. "Please, Jax. Please understand."

Jackson let out a long sigh. "I'm trying, Fal." One muscular arm wrapped itself around her shoulders and brought her closer. She felt him press a kiss to the top of her head. "I hate it,  but I'm trying."

Alpha Blake and Luna Riley were right on time, as always. Riley was an empath and she felt Fallon's grief the moment she stepped into the room.

"Fallon, what is it?" Riley rushed to her side, her beautiful face stamped with concern.

Fallon managed a wobbly smile. "I'm fine, Riley. Thank you." Her gaze moved to include Blake and their son, Grey. "Please, sit down."  

Blake didn't need to be asked twice, or at all, really, and headed directly for his favourite chair. He and Riley weren't only their Alpha and Luna, they were their good friends and regularly shared meals and special occasions together. 

The boys had already migrated to the couch and shifted over to make space for Grey at the end beside Lucas. 

"Red okay with you, Riley?" Jackson called from the bar.

"Red's fine, thank you, Jackson." Riley kept her worried gaze on Fallon as she sank down in the chair next to her mate. 

"Blake?" Jackson glanced over his shoulder as he poured. "Beer or scotch tonight?"