Faint Of Heart [Ivar x Reader]

Chapter 17

A.N.: Thank you so much for your wonderful feedback, I hope you enjoy it! ❤

The following days were more or less a torture for you. It was as if the news of your brother's arrival had created a whirlpool in the sea of emotions inside of you, you went from angry to sad on a daily basis but there was one thing for sure, your mind was being haunted by memories and as the time passed, you found yourself being unable to get a good night's sleep.

You were sure that Ivar was aware of how silent you had become, but he didn't comment on it. You were sure that he was annoyed by it, but you doubted he knew how to approach the topic, or if he would wish to approach it at all.

Possibly not.

He seemed to be very busy anyway.

In fact, the only person who seemed to have time for you was Hvitserk and you were aware that even if he could see the lack of sleep taking its toll on you.

"Have you slept last night at all?"

You gave the pieces of raw meat to your falcon slowly, and ran your fingers over her soft feathers.

"Y/N."

"I seem to have nightmares," You mumbled, and heard his sigh behind you, "It's not important, really. You have no need to worry."

"You look tired."

The falcon cooed and you tried to smile as you watched her flap her wings.

"I am tired a little," You confessed and looked over your shoulder, "It's quite alright."

"Tell him to stop tiring you then," Hvitserk said, gritting his teeth, "Ivar."

You turned your gaze to the falcon again, your cheeks burning, "I told you, you have no need to worry."

"You look like when you first got here."

That sent a shiver down your spine and you gritted your teeth, frowning deeply.

"Yet I am not like that, Hvitserk. Far from it."

A silence fell upon him for a moment, "You know, I never really liked your brother."

"We seem to have that in common," You muttered and turned your back to the falcon, crossing your arms, "How about you? Did you and Bjorn talk again?"

He looked uncomfortable for a moment, "No. He's busy, everyone is."

"With what?"

"Apparently, Floki will be finished with the ships way before we thought he would."

That made your head snap up, "What? So soon?"

Hvitserk shrugged slightly, "Looks like you are not the only one with lack of sleep in Kattegat."

You felt your heart sinking "And...will- will you all go to this raid? When Floki is done?"

"I'm looking forward to it. That's the only reason Bjorn is here, Ubbe and Torvi can barely wait for it and even if he claims otherwise, Ivar was not born to be a king, not really. He likes the battle way too much for that."

Alone.

You would be alone. Open to any attack.

"I had a thought last night," You could feel your heart beating in your ears, "When Ivar goes to this raid, I will be in charge of Kattegat and everything and everyone in it, will I not? I could just ask a warrior to seize my brother and- and- do whatever I wish," A small, bitter laughter escaped from your lips, "If he dares to- to come here uninvited, he shall see how-"