𝐀𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐘𝐨𝐮 [Discontinued]

3. Only you

Harry's pov

I don't know if I'm shocked or surprised. I don't know if she's joking around or being serious. Didn't she just tell me that she loves me? Or did I misheard something?

"What d-do you mean?" I stuttered frightened by her answer. I could see the fresh tears forming in her eyes again. Okay, she's not joking.

"I-" she sniffed blinking back those tears. "I heard your earlier conversation with Kathy" she explained.

Shit!

Just when I'm thinking everything's going fine. Of course, it's my life, the word 'fine' never fits in.

"Gin..." I jumped out of the bed. "She confessed her feelings but I didn't say anything, I swear. Kathy's my friend, I don't like her that way" I'm trying to make more excuses but she cut me off.

"I know, Harry."

"Uh?"

"I know you don't like Kathy in that way. That's the problem" she said fighting back the tears.

"Problem? So, me not returning those feelings is the problem? And me loving you is the problem?" I snapped. Why is she being so tricky now?

"No. But things would have been easy if you love her instead and if I...never loved you" I can understand the hesitant tone but she it still got me mad.

"Ginny, this is ridiculous! What do you want me to do? Go after her and forget you? If you don't want to be in a relationship with me, I'll try to handle it but I can't force myself to love someone that isn't you" I guess I'm shouting because her body tensed up all of a sudden.

She slowly stepped towards me with some rage in her eyes. "I'm not telling you to love her. I would never say that because it will break my heart to see you with someone else. Just because you say you love me thousand times doesn't change anything, Harry. I love you too...so much, you've got no idea. But.....
Everything is so messed up that I can't think straight..."  and the tears she's holding all this time finally flooded out.

I stooped closer pulling her into a tight embrace.  I rubbed her back softly. "Sorry, gin. I didn't mean to shout at you. It's just, I was happy like a couple of minutes before when we were kissing and hearing you say you love me and now...I'm the one who's messed up, gin. Every trouble begins with me"

She shook her head instantly stepping away from me. "Don't blame yourself for everything, Harry. It's not you. Actually, it's Kathy, she's our friend. She deserves love, Harry, more than me because she never actually got it from anyone in her whole life."

I'm confused. "What do you mean?"

Ginny explained about Kathy's parent's death and Kathy's grandmother who doesn't treat her right. It reminded me of myself. I know how difficult it is to live without parents, I've gone through all that and it's still a void that I can't fill.

"She loves you. If we say this to her, I know how much this would break her heart. And she'd never talk to us again. I don't want to lose her, Harry"

"And we won't lose her," I assured her. "We won't be in a relationship. I don't know where this will leave us but I'm guessing I am still your friend, right?" I asked with a chuckle ignoring the pain that's erupting in my heart. As much I want to stay strong, it still hurts. I can't be with the girl I love.

I looked at ginny, she also has a pained expression on her face. "Of course," she said with a gulp.

At least she loves me. I tried to compromise myself.

Pain is not foreign to me.

****************************

We settled back on the bed. I'm surprised not even one girl stepped here.
It's been five minutes, we sat silently neither of us talking. I don't want us to be like this.

"Sirius came earlier to hogsmeade. He suggested I buy you some sweets. I didn't because I was too diligent to find you and talk to you"

I heard her chuckle which is sure music to my ears. "Wait, he knew you were at hogsmeade?" She asked.

"Of course, he knew. I wrote to him yesterday and told him about the hogsmeade weekend, that's the reason why he showed up in the first place"

"But harry, around 5 or 5:30 in the evening he came to me and asked about you," she said as she crossed her legs, sitting still.

"But he visited me in hogsmeade. Why would he ask about me? And what are you two talking behind my back?" I questioned with a supposed to be stern tone but came out funnily.

She blushed. I stared at her, stunned. Damn! She doesn't blush often but I want to see that blush more and more. She looks just angelic.

"I have to thank sirius. If it weren't for him, I would have never acknowledged my feelings for you" she blushed deeply this time making me want to kiss her at the moment. My face fell knowing that I can't, though we love each other, we can't.

"So, my godfather had to put some sense into you," I said making her laugh. We talked for another hour. Mostly, we talked about dean, reminding me of how stupidly I behaved with him. Also, all my memories back in little whining. I explained everything since the day I met her. She was shocked indeed. But what she said surprised me

"you could have asked me out back then, harry. We would have been together by now with out any... worry" I understood she hesitated to say Kathy's name.

"You would have accepted me then?" I smirked.

"Of course! How can I miss a handsome guy like you?" She winked at me. My mouth fell wide open, I covered my face hiding the now formed red color on my cheeks. She laughed.

"Don't say things like that. I will kiss you" I warned. Now, it's her turn to blush. Hehe.

Later, the conversation somehow shifted to my parents, she knows my past. Now, I have nothing to hide.

"I'm sorry, Harry. I hurt you so badly, I always have and I'm still hurting you. Why do even love me? I'm cruel. You deserve someone better" she said between sobs.

"No. I deserve you and only you. I just saw you, ginny. You're going through a lot of pain and hurt just because you don't want to see your friend get hurt. How lucky am I to have someone like you? It only increased my feelings for you." I confessed. "But still you're insane"

"Yeah, I insanely love you" she muttered under her breath but I heard because the room is so quiet. I shivered at those words, I felt butterflies and heat radiating through my neck and cheeks.

"What did you say?" I smirked.

"Nothing" she shook nervously.

I grinned sheepishly and pulled her closer to me by placing my hands on her waist.

"Harry!" She shrieked. I didn't let go and she gave up.

She placed her hands around my neck and rested her head on my shoulders. This is the best feeling ever. Even though we are not together, she's still next to me.

"I love you too" I kissed her forehead.

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The End 😉🤪

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