❝I wanna see you in cat ears, and on your knees.❞
❝Say shit like this one more time and I'll fuck you like a dumb whore.❞
***
Pranks are harmless, they said. Whoever said that fuckery was utterly wrong because if pranks were harmless, that wouldn't...
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crazy bitch: do you know that there are 242 tiles in our restroom?
Me: What!?
crazy bitch: you know when you forget to take your phone in restroom and all you have to do is to count tiles while waiting for your asshole to do its job?
Never did that?
Me: No.
crazy bitch: you're weird
+ that '.' is scary
Me: you're the weird one here
crazy bitch: yeah ik
that's why I find a normie like you weird
( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)
Me: Normie?
crazy bitch: oh forgot, you're a dumb old outdated product
normie means normal aka boring
Me: First, I'm not old or 0outdated
Second, fuck you
crazy bitch: Yes daddy, fuck me
Me: ew *reported* *blocked*
crazy bitch: *cock
Me: What. The. Actual. Fuck.
crazy bitch: I mean cockblock
yk what does that mean?
When you badly wanna get railed but you find out your boyfriend don't have rod but a toothpick
or, when you wanna fuck your girlfriend and she say "daddy suck my toes"
I burst out laughing, the familiar sound of my laughing echoed.
Me: OMG THAT'S FUCKING HILARIOUS
I'M LAUGHING SO HARD RN
The second one
crazy bitch: OMG IKR
I LAUGHED SO HARD TOO
Me: Well let me tell you one incident.
crazy bitch: Okay, I'm listening
*reading
Me: It was a long time ago when I was 18. I went to the club
