Yellow || hs au

| 83 |

"I'm sorry it took so long, traffic was awful." I explain briefly. Harry simply shakes his head and holds his hand out towards me. I take it without a second thought, but instead of pulling me into his lap like I wanted him to, he sits me right beside him on the couch. I look up at him through my lashes, his face softening as his lips thin into a frown. He holds my hip with one hand, his other reaching up to brush my hair behind my ear.

"I made a decision today," He begins, his thumb slowly tracing my cheek bone, down to trace the shape of my lips. "A decision that I should have made with you," he goes on, his eyes following his own movements as he traces my jawline right back up to my ear where he gently fiddles with my earrings. "It's a decision that puts our relationship at jeopardy." He mumbles, my body stiffening. I gently move towards him but he pushes against my hip, keeping me in my place as he finds my gaze.

"Harry." I whisper, my hand finding his arm that is covered with a grey long sleeve shirt. I stare up at him, swallowing hard as I wait for him to continue. He stares at me for another moment, keeping his hands permanently placed on my body, his eyes tracing all of my features just like he did the first time he saw me.

"I'm going away for three months." He finally voices, his words slapping me across the face, even though I knew they were coming. "I'm going to a rehab center in Maine, I'm going to get better." He whispers, his throat bobbing as he swallows. He screws his eyes closed, and once again, he forces me to stay put when I try to reach for him. "But I'm not going to sit here and tell you to move on from me, Clover." He says, his eyes fluttering back open to expose his glossy gaze.

   I shake my head, my own tears slowly beginning to blur my vision as I stare at him. He wets his lips, his hand on my hip shakily moves my hoodie up and he rests his warm hand on my cold skin. He winces immediately, and I can see the way his lips part that he wants to scold me for only wearing a hoodie and nothing under it on a day as cold at today.

   "I've been selfish in this relationship from the start, but when it comes to you, baby," he whispers, his hand falling from my face and down to the side of my thigh. He gently grips my flesh, his finger tips delicately dig into my skin and the urge to touch him only grows. "I can't help it, I'm always going to want you for myself, I don't want to share you." He continues, holding his gaze with my teary one. "So wait for me. Keep me." He whispers, my tears finally gliding down the sides of my face.

   I swallow hard as I stare up at him through my thick tears, my bottom lip trembling uncontrollably. I blink away the tears but as soon as they're gone, more take their place. Harry finally pulls me into his lap, his arms wrapping protectively around my lower back as I fit myself against his warm body. My arms go around his neck, both of our tears mixing as our cheeks come in contact. He squeezes me tightly before he pulls away, beginning to wipe my cheeks with the pads of his thumbs.

   "I'll be right here." I whisper assuringly to him, my hands falling to hold onto his shoulders. He stares up at me, the tears tricking from the corners of his eyes make my heart ache deeply in my chest. "I'll always be right here, when you're ready, bubs." I nod, my forehead falling to rest gently against his own. He squeezes me tighter, my arms slithering back around his neck as we quietly sit together.

   Harry pulls his face away from mine and pushes it right back into my neck, as if he's trying to hide himself. I don't say anything and I simply just allow him to hold me and need me, just as I do the same with him. His smell is intoxicating, the comfortable and familiar scent of his apartment, mixed with his natural smell makes my entire body feel warm and at ease. Being back in his arms after what feels like decades, nothing even matters anymore. The fact that he leaves tonight, doesn't matter right now. Because I'm his forever, and he knows that. No matter how far away he is, for however long, I'll always be waiting to bring him back home.