No Control-n.h

Chapter 19

Its been a week and its the day before they go to the auditions.

I told them that I didn't want to go because its not going to get my grades where I want them even though I know it's because of Niall and Harry, so its just me in my flat and Vanessa's round at the guy's helping Louis pack.

Right now, I'm playing my guitar in our room.
My suitcase is out on the floor glaring at me through the open zip, yes I packed, just in case I change my mind, but I can't see it happening and I'm just too lazy to unpack anyways.

Setting my guitar down, I get off the bed and shove my suitcase in my closet so I can forget about it. It's then that I realise, I'm still in my pyjamas and I need to get ready so I trudge back to my closet and drag the suitcase out, digging through my clothes for my outfit of the day.

All I can find that looks pretty decent right now is my white tea dress so I throw it on and tie my hair up in a messy bun.

After applying my make-up I slip on my glasses and go to brush my teeth.

I've been wearing my contacts for the past couple of weeks because some days are just glasses days and others I can't be bothered but today I'll leave them on.

I'm really in the mood for a morning coffee, so I grab my leather jacket, throw on my converse and walk out of the door with my phone in my hand.

I decide to check my emails while I wait.

One reads:

Dear Miss Thirlwall,

We understand that you have asked for your course work to be emailed to you due to some minor changes in your timetable. We have sent everything you need to you in the files below, and if you need anything or any extra information just email us back, and we'll sort be happy to help.

Files;

70+

Best wishes.

I'm pretty sure that I emailed the Uni last week asking if I could rearrange it all but I guess i'll just show up to class when they restart and they'll hopefully let it slide.

Getting to the counter, I order my usual and sit in the corner by the window.

If I go with the boys, how could I go without my daily morning coffee? Just then, a hand sits on my shoulder making me jump and spill some coffee on the table.

I grab a napkin and begin mopping it up, to turn and find his smile.

The smile I adore, the smile that makes me smile.

"Hey," I laugh, mostly at my weird thoughts but because he stuck his tongue out after.

"Hiya, morning coffee?" he assumes.

I nod happily, taking a small sip.

"I think i'll join you on that one," he grins, walking over to the counter and getting himself one.

He comes back, flashing his pearly whites as he takes a seat opposite me.

"Looking nice as always," he smiles, scanning me.

"Thanks Niall," I say, brushing a loose hair out of my eyes.

"I love the way you dress."

"Dropping hints are we?" I ask, taking my coffee and beginning to walk away.

"Hey wait, i'll come back to your flat, I don't really wanna be the 5th wheel with Cara, Zayn, Nessa and Lou," he says, jogging up by me.
I couldn't help but wonder where Harry must be.

I nod my head and we get into the lift, then once we reach my floor, fly into the flat and flop onto the sofa.

He walks towards my room and I follow, intrigued as to why he's gone in there.

"You're coming," he cries, excitedly, as he eyes my suitcase.

"No, I packed in advance but I don't think I'll be going," I sigh, sitting on the corner of my bed.

I watch as his eyes lose their excitement and he seems quite sad at my comment.

"Oh," is all he replies with.

I switch on the television to drown out the awkwardness.

He sits beside me on the bed and begins picking up some music sheets I'd forgot to put away.

"You write music?" he asks, looking impressed.

"A little," I laugh, still focused on the screen.

He begins flicking through sheets before he picks one in particular and sits my guitar on his lap.

I'd written a song called 'How long will I love you'. (Authors note- I know its by Ellie Goulding, I just thought it's the perfect song).

He starts strumming away the chords and trying out some of the lyrics.

"How long will I love you? As long as stars are above you....And longer if I can," he sings.

"Sing with me," he smiles, handing me the sheet and I shuffle closer to him.

"How long will I need you? As long as the seasons need to...Follow their plan," I harmonise, smiling idiotically at the sound given off by us.

I blush tremendously as he flashes me a smile, it feels like i'd set fire to my cheeks for a minute. 
Placing the guitar on it's stand, we lose the eye contact for a second and I long for it back, which is at that moment that he turns to face me.

He gently places his hand on the back of my neck and pulls me towards him never breaking his stare.

My stomach is now resting against him and I'm kind of frozen.

Suddenly, he leans in, directing his eyes towards my lips as he bites his, making the butterflies inside me go wild and he cups my cheek.

But as I close my eyes slightly and watch as he leans in further, he ghosts his lips ever so slightly against mine and stops, pulling back.

"If you want more... You'll just have to come to the auditions with us won't you?" he winks and walks out of the room, leaving me in absolute shock.

Should I go and see what happens?

I just don't know if it will work, what do I do?
And what about Harry? I can't shake what happened between us.