A Suicide Note

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A Suicide Note

We made a toast, on our finest champagne,
On my darkest night, of a thunderous stormy rain
You warn me twice, yet I invite our so- called friends
They enter our bar, but now in wine we're drenched
Some celebrate, some hope for this party to end
Mindlessly, I drink to down away this pain

As I see the shape of you through the glass of our drink, bright hues
Right through the liquor, you got me wasted
So sinful but quite addictive, I'm too drunk on us, unaware

You stab me with your guilt-sharpened knife
I don't mind the pain, but why wasn't it sharpened through hatred?
"This doesn't kill, just hurts", and now I don't know what's worse,
The glass half empty, half full, or just empty handed?

And the people you once warned me about, call us names,
I get up, feeling scared, please don't blame me for the mistakes,
I make when drunk, I know you have no choice, now it's too late
Out of spite, I switch my drink, wondering if it was the antidote
But it was worse than what I had left, and now it's too late
In the name of loyalty, just another bottle I'd have to break

Now I see your jagged figure, Through the broken glass,
A hundred million divisions,
Of my fears, in multiplied vision
They sing songs about love, trying to outdo ours,

And the realisation blinds me through the reflection of the broken shards,
Flash forward to the consequences of this drink, in a spur
Wondering why its in black and white, our beloved future

The voices only grew louder, cause through eyes I hear better,
So paralysed, I stay here, lying in the grave of your buried hatchets,
Drowning in my tears, waiting for it to kill me, but all it does is more damage
Your black eyes, reflecting my reflection, and my fate,
Offering me the drink, you say, it's never too late

All I reason with my rejection is, hating you for spiking this with regrets
I know it's my fault, will you really blame a loner like me?
Is it wrong that I got drunk to feel sober and free?
Calling this planned intoxicating drink, a murder, I write my will to you
Cause I loved you, I swear I did, so I write this love letter to you,
Drinks are fatal, just like forbidden love, so I write my suicide note to you

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