An assortment of the most cringe and cliché plots and storylines, with a side of bts.
Disclaimer: The entirety of this book is ALL satire. I do not actually write this badly lol.
I went to J hopes room because I was hungry and wanted him to make me food. "J hope oppar?" I walked into his room and all of a sudden the door shut behind me. I felt two arms wrap around me and giggled.
"Jhope oppar stahhhp." I closed my eyes like a dumb bitch.
"Try again." A raspy hot musky male voice whispered into my ear.
Jimin:
I gasped and turned around to see Jimin oppar smirking. "W-What are you doing in here. Where is Jhope?" I moved back.
"It doesn't matter." He grabbed me by the waist and pulled me closer to him. I'm not going to lie, he's really attractive. "Let's play together." He smirked.
"Naur! I don't want to." I backed away with barely any force because I never try to actually escape.
"Come on Y/N, GIVE ME A CHONCE!" He begged but I still said no. Jimin leaned in to kiss me and I didn't back away. Gosh y/n why is my mind doing this to me!!1!!1! I'm loyal to Jackson oppar.
He bit my nose and I moaned.
"You taste really good babygorl." He licked his lips.
All of a sUdden, Jin came through the door and his jaw dropped. "Y/N WHERE WERE YOU YOUNG LADY. YOU HAD ME SCARED TO DEATH!"
I ran to my Eomma's arms and cried. "It's okay." Jin comforted me. "I won't let them ever hurt you." The man who kidnapped me said.
"O-Okay. I trust you." I hugged him.
"Bitch what?" Jimin nearly choked.
"He's different. He actually cares about me." I sniffled and blinked my orbs at Jimin.
Okay there was a smut (literally rape) scene in the book and it was so cringe and toxic and grosssss. All the boys literally slept with her and she didn't seem to mind after. LIKE BITCH YOUR KIDNAPPER ASKED TO SLEEP WITH YOU, WHEN YOU SAID NO AND THEN DID IT ANYWAYS AND NOW YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON HIM. MISS ME WITH THAT BULLSHIT. 👁👄👁
ALL OF A SUDDEN Jackson arrived at Y/N's balcony when she was all alone.
"Jackson oppar??!" I screamed in excitement and ran over to hug him.
"OH DAMN GIRL." Jackson held his nose and backed away from me. "Have you showered since you've been here."
I shook my head.
"Brushed your teeth?" He raised his brows in disgust.
I shook my head.
"U nasty as fuck." His voice was nasally as he continued to hold his nose. "Anyways. I'm here to rescue you. Come on." He started to walk, but I resisted.
"I-I don't know if I wanna leave this place." I sighed as I dramatically touched the wall, staring at it like I was in a Bollywood movie.
Jackson:
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"I'm sorry, WHAT?"
"I just- I-I-I got attached to them. You know?" I bit my lip and tucked my hair behind my ear. "They're just misunderstood. They did this to protect me Jackson. Everyone is after me."
"Who tf would be after you— okay, that's not the point. I'm literally here to save you and you're declining my offer??" Jackson was in awe at the stupidity.
"I—"
"Y/N? Are you trying to escape?"
I gasped when I saw Jin standing there, along with the other boys. "Naur Eomma! It's not what it looks like!"
"Yes it is Y/N, now come on!" Jackson insisted.
"How could you do this to your Eomma." Jin lowered his head. "I didn't think you would leave after everything we've done for you."
"I-It's not like that!" I bit my lip and turned to Jackson. "I-I have to tell you something."
"Make it quick, I have a hair appointment in 30 minutes." Jackson looked down at his watch.
"I fell in love with someone else while I was here." I bit my lip and turned to Jungkook.
"Eww bitch I don't like you."
"And I don't like you either so idk what tf you're talking about." Jackson crossed his arms.
"O-Of course you guys like me. E-Every guy likes me because of how mysterious and shy and pretty I am."
"Nah." All the boys started talking amongst themselves.
"So?" Jackson raised his brow. "Are you coming?"
"Yeah, what's it gonna be Y/N?" Jin pouted.
I bit my lip and paced back and fourth. "I-I-I-I"
Everyone glared at me, waiting for my answer.
I stood in the middle of both of them and let my hair down. "I've got to move on and be who I am! I just don't belong here, I hope you understand." I looked at Jackson. "We might find a place in this world someday... but at least for now. I gotta go my own way."
"Say no more." Jackson did a backflip off the balcony.
"YAYYY!!" Jin celebrated as he pulled me into a hug.
"I had to pick you guys. You all have been so good to me." I smiled.
"We're glad you made this decision. And for that reason, we're deciding to sell you to Zico." Jin casually said with a smile.
Zico appeared out of no where. "Okey Dokey y—"
He collapsed to the floor after Namjoon punched him.
"W-What?" I gasped. "W-Why would you sell me away? I thought I was special?? Whyyyy?!!"
"Well, we all decided that you're just too dumb for any of us to actually like you." Jin casually said.
"How could you do this to me?! I'm not your little dog?!" I cried.
"Roof Roof." Jimin barked from the corner.
"Sorry Y/N. You're Zico's now."
"Actually." Zico got up from the floor, holding his bruised eye. "I don't want this hoe. I'm good." He gave a peace sign and vanished into thin air.
"Well in that case, you're free to go Y/N." Jin smiled.
"Y-You don't want me anymore??" I bit my lip.
"No, not really." Namjoon said calmly.
"Look at me!! I'm trying to escape!!" I ran over to the balcony, waiting for someone to come capture me again. I bit my lip when I saw Jungkook coming forward. I knew he wanted me.
Jungkook shoved me off the balcony, before patting his hands together. "Anyways, what's for dinner?"
