Together (Sequel of 'Broken Hearts')

Chapter 3: Nazar

I finished swallowing what I had in my mouth and took a minute to think about what he just told me, a frown softly appearing on my face. "Why?" I ended up asking, the frown deepening.

"It's just that you're stuck at home when I'm not there and I thought you would enjoy going outside on your own when you want to... You know, have some independence and be more free of your movements.." He explained and I felt my stomach squeeze painfully.

"I don't need a guide dog." I said, putting my fork down. I couldn't believe what he was suggesting.

"I didn't say that. I just thought you would like being able to go out and walk around the city while I'm working..."

"Well you're wrong. And you better not bring one of those here." I answered in a low voice as I got up. Firstly he wanted to foster kids and now he wanted to bring a guide dog... Why did he want so much change in our lives? Was it a midlife crisis? Was our routine not sufficient for him anymore?

"Hey, I didn't mean it in a bad way. And I'm sorry if I offended you. It wasn't my intention." He told me in a soft voice as he put one of his hands on my shoulder. "I talked to Imogen earlier and..."

"I didn't spend a big part of my life learning how to be independent and act as if I could see for you to get me a guide dog. I really mean it when I told you that you better not bring one here. I don't want one." I told him as I tried to stop my hands from shaking. 

This conversation was bringing back memories of my childhood and teenage years where my father used to punish me everytime I acted not normal enough for him. It made me remember how long and difficult it had been to always think and turn my head toward the sound of people's voice until it ended up being an automatism. It also made me remember the days I had to spend walking around the house to know it by heart and walk normally just so my father wouldn't be ashamed when people were around. Without forgetting the countless dinners where the plates and objects were always at the same place so I could use them without any hesitations and pretend I could see. My father had always spoke badly about guide dogs and used to say they were only for people too lazy to make their brains work. But I wasn't like that and I knew I didn't need one.

"I'm really sorry. I thought you might like one but I was clearly wrong. I shouldn't have suggested it. Please, don't be mad at me." He whispered, squeezing my shoulder softly and I sighed. I knew he didn't mean it in a bad way.

"I'm not mad... I know you didn't mean it in a bad way but don't suggest it again, please. I don't want or need one." I replied, finally turning around. 

"I just thought you would like one the same way you liked the new oven or appliances we got over the years. I thought it would have made your life easier but I get it." He replied and I felt a kiss on my cheek a few seconds later, making a small smile appear on my face. "Let's finish dinner?"

I nodded and sat back. "Appliances are different. It helps me be independent and do my own things. A guide dog would make me dependent on that dog and that's not something that I want."

The subject shifted and the rest of the meal was spent talking about random things and, once the dinner was over, the discomfort was gone and the good mood was back between us. We washed the dishes and went upstairs. I went to the bathroom where I undressed myself before going in the shower. As the hot water was hitting my back, I closed my eyes and felt my muscles slowly relax. I was surprised to feel fingertips on my back, making me jump slightly. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you..." Ante whispered in a low voice as I turned around.

"It's okay, I just didn't expect you. It's been a while since we showered together..." I replied, a small smile appearing on my face.

"I still feel really bad about earlier, I..."