Transverse

Prologue

This is a work of fiction. Unless otherwise indicated, all the names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents in this book are either the product of the author's imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons; living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

"We're leaving." said my mom. I could tell that she was sad and mad. "Cara, what are you doing!?" My dad shouted. "I'm leaving, we're leaving!" she shouted back. At the age of seventeen, I realized then and there, in between my parents shouting and pointing fingers, that not all love ends with a happy ending.

"Stop!" I yelled. They both looked at me while panting and sweating. "Mom, I can't. No, I don't want to go with you." I firmly said. "No baby, you can't stay, we can't stay here!" my mom answered.

I knew I just had to say it. "Well I don't care! If-if your marriage is failing, or if all of this is too much to handle. I found what I want to do, Mom! I want to be a model, I want to represent, not just clothes but what I believe in. To be in front of cameras, to entertain, to finally use my voice for a cause! And now that I finally found a way to start, you decide to put an end to it, this quickly!? The world isn't just about the both of you, okay!? You're dragging each other to hell, and you don't realize that you're bringing me down with you! Well, to think about it, this IS already hell!" I shouted.

Both of them gave me a sad expression. "Don't even think about blaming each other. I'm sick of it." I said before heading to my room and slamming the door.

This was the day. The day I knew that music couldn't cover my ears enough for me to escape what's been going on around me. The day that the blanket of melody couldn't protect me from the world without rainbows and butterflies. The day that I realized, I'm all alone.

Listening to Filipino music really calmed my nerves. Eraserheads, Sponge Cola, and many more were my shelter. They bring sunshine in the darkest days, but this was different, I felt it. I've finally come to the conclusion that music cannot comfort me forever. I have to think of other ways to deal with the real world, with or without anyone beside me.

It was hard considering I didn't have a best friend. It was messed up, really. She manipulated me. I felt like a dog. I felt like one of her toys. Messed around with, then discarded. This expression is only used for people who got their heart broken by boyfriends and such, but it's actually much more painful to feel that from a best friend; someone you thought would ease the pain and walk through the storm with you.

As I was sitting there being consumed by my thoughts, I heard a knock on my door. It was my wonderful parents. I quickly covered my ears with a pillow before they even stepped foot inside.

"Hey, can we talk?" My dad asked. I didn't have a choice. As much as I wanted to say no and make them leave, I knew I just had to hear something from them. A reason. A reason why there's always shouting. A reason for my pain. A reason why the family I knew was no longer the same.

"We know you have questions, so feel free to ask us. We owe you answers, hon." My mom bitterly smiled.

"What happened?" I ask.

They look at each other and Dad nods at Mom, then the spotlight is back to me. "I.. We.." Dad sighs.

"I don't know how to tell you this." Dad sighed again. Sighs in my family symbolizes something so serious, only grown ups are allowed to discuss it.

"Dad, I'm seventeen. I'll turn eighteen in less than a year. I can take it." I said. They look at each other once again, but with sad eyes this time.

"Your mother.. She cheated." Dad smiled sadly. I saw my Mom look down at the corner of my eye. "And I'm guessing that you did too just to get back at her?" I said. Dad nodded.

I laughed. I laughed as hard as I could. Then I cried.

"Both of you acting like complete children is absolutely hilarious!" I laughed. They stared at me without a word. "It almost feels like I'm the mature one in this family." I said, stopping my laugh.

"..that's not all of it." My mom said from behind. "The woman your father cheated on me with, is pregnant." she added.

I laughed again. "All those safe sex lectures, now look at you, dad. Haha!" I laughed and laughed.

Then it suddenly hit me. A lady is out there, carrying my brother or sister. "How about you, mom? Are you pregnant too?" I sarcastically asked.

"Yes." She answered. I stared at her with wide eyes. "Wow. Two siblings in just less than a year. I guess those prayers worked." I said. I felt my eyes heat up, and tears started flowing from them, non-stop.

"Why?" I asked them. "Why.. How.. Did you let yourselves do this without even thinking about me?" I ask them, barely even saying the words right.

"I'm not leaving until you discuss this without the shouting, screaming, fingers, and reckless manners." I firmly said.

"Now please, leave." I said and they headed to the door. As soon as they left, I bawled my eyes out. I cried and cried until there were no tears left. I stop crying and look for the bottle of water I brought earlier. As I was drinking, I noticed the raindrops on my window.

"So the sky cries with me." I whispered and bitterly smiled at myself. The family I used to have, crumbled before my eyes and I did nothing.

I thought about it. And I hated them for doing that without even thinking that, it's not just themselves they'll be hurting. They'll hurt me too. The sound of rain was able to calm my nerves and eventually put me to sleep.

I woke up in the middle of the night feeling hungry. I slept through dinner, I suppose. A knock suddenly interrupted my zoning out and it was Mom. "I didn't wanna wake you, so I just waited for you to wake up. Dinner's ready, baby." She smiled and I nodded before she closed the door.

I sat in front of the table while rubbing my eyes. They both look at me as if they're going to say something. "Is there something on my face?" I asked.

"No darling. We've made up our minds. And we thought, why don't you be the one to choose whether you want to stay or go?" My Dad said.

I felt myself smiling without even thinking of smiling. I ate dinner while thinking of where I wanna go.

I stayed up all night to think about everything; pros and cons, the things I'll be leaving and the things I would find in a foreign country.

As soon as I've made up my mind, I make my way to their room.

"I've decided. I'm going."