Sabır (Patience) - Kurulus Osman

Chapter 50

"How's Konur?" He smirked back, and she pretended to never hear him, and instead, pressed on one of his bruises, making him inhale sharply and change the topic. "How are you here?"

"I made up with Selcan yenge and Bala. I thought to help them build the lodge." She left out the part of being told to come here. "How are you here?" She glanced at Goktug.

"I tricked Balgay into letting me capture Boran, and we searched for Osman Bey until the tracks led us here," he answered, and she hummed in surprise.

"Are you sure you're not dripping blood on me?" Boran playfully glared at her red right hand, and she chuckled lightly.

"It wouldn't make a difference anyway; you're already covered in blood...and dirt. Did someone step on you?"

"Well...it wasn't just anyone," said Goktug, and Ceyda raised her brow.

"Alright, don't fill me in on the details of Boran's torture," she shuddered. "The rest will heal over time...and no one will see it, so you're done."

Boran scoffed. "Thank you, Doctor Ceyda," he said sarcastically, and Ceyda shoved him aside to sit, grabbing the jug of water she brought to clean her hands before passing them to the Alps.

There was another moment of silence before Ceyda buried her face in her hands. "I'm bored," she whined. Her attention span was getting shorter and shorter over the days.

Boran groaned too. "Don't bother me, I'm already tired. Look, they have chickens, go stare at them."

"No." She looked back at the hut to see Bala by Osman's side, tears dropping from her eyes. She sighed at her insensitiveness. But somehow, she didn't feel any sorrow for Osman or sympathy for Bala and her aunt. She felt...nothing. What is wrong with me?

It was dawn by the time Bala left Osman's side to sit by Selcan near some trees at the far end of the field. The Sheikh and dervishes ordered themselves in a small circle and were praying with their eyes closed for focus. Boran's eyelids were drooping, and Goktug disappeared behind the trees that led into a forest, leaving with an excuse to take a walk. Ceyda stood and adjusted Boran's head so that it leaned against the trunk of the tree behind them; he was now sleeping.

Her instincts taking over and pulling her toward an unconscious Osman, Ceyda glanced around the lodge; everyone was busy. She found her dagger resting by the small table beside her and grabbed it, staring at Osman curiously and maliciously. Whispers raced through her mind, thoughts that weren't her own but became them as the whispers loudened: Kill him. The iron fist of the Mongols wants it so. Your father orders it so. Kill him!

She raised her dagger, an evil smile gracing her lips. "Rest in torture, Osman Bey." She thrust the dagger down...

...when a pair of strong hands gripped her own, pulling the dagger out of her grasp, and Ceyda fell to the side with it, screaming in frustration as her hands slammed the ground. Reality placed itself in front of her and her screaming died down, replaced by short and quick breaths that came out as rapid gasps. She blinked to see Selcan and Bala staring at her in shock while Sheikh Edebali looked at her with confusion, and a concerned pair of striking blue eyes jolted her memory, and she remembered what she did. Someone peeled her off the floor, and she looked down at her trembling hands. Her dagger was thrown a foot from her, blood on its tip. She pushed off the man who held her and ran into the forest.

When her legs wore out, she dropped by the trunk of a thick tree, panting as drops of liquid fell from her eyes. "What have I done...what have I done...what have I done?" she cried, her hands hitting the sides of her head. "No, no, no." The whispers returned: You failed. Go back! Kill him! She hit her head harder to get them out. "No!" You defy your commander's orders? "Shut up!" You dare disobey your father- "GO AWAY!" And they did.