Hiding // a.i.

4. books and bitches

- Xanthey -

Xander has been bugging me about the storage cupboard accident since last night. He won't stop asking me about it and in all honesty i don't really want to talk about it. It happened now its time to move on. All I want is to be invisiable again. Knowing that people look at me and actually know my name kind of makes me uneasy. I'm so used to being in my bubble and doing what I like and having no issues is easy, however, when people know you exist makes life harder. Oh the joys. 

The whole day as been good so far, everything has been relaxed and I haven't had any problems with Bree and her two dummies. It was lunch time and that means pizza time. Every wednesday the school ladies make pizza and its not as good as Dominos but its the next best thing for school lunches. Aggie the lunch lady always makes sure there are two pieces left for me as they always sell out and she knows its my favourite food.  

"Thanks Aggie! How is your cat going?" Aggie is a little old lady who has a cat called Henry who has one eye. 

"He is just grand, thanks for asking doll. Enjoy your pizza." She gives me a warm smile. I like Aggie she is always so kind to me and since I am kind to her back and actually converse with her I get pizza. I quickly walk over to my table in the corner of the cafeteria and munch my way through my pizza and slurping on my lemonade. Its the perfect combination. I realised that I have to book a study room for Michael and I for our project we are working on. I get up to leave and put my plates on the side for the ladies to clean them, as I did Bree dumps pasta bake all over me. 

"Whoops." She gives me a devilish smile and the whole room bursts into laughter. My cheeks turn chimson and I run out of the cafeteria. Tears burn the back of my eyes. Why does she have to be so mean to me, its not like I have done anything to her. She can have Ashton I don't care. 

"Hey Xanthey wait up." It was an Australian accent but I dare look back to see who it was. Please don't be Ashton. "Xanthey please stop walking so fast." They hold my shoulders and I glance up to see Ashton. Fuck me. 

"Please just leave me alone." I tried to shrug his hand off my shoulders but he is too strong for me. 

"I have a spare shirt in my locker, you can use that if you don't have a spare shirt" He gives me a kind smile. I don't have another shirt and I was honestly going to just wipe the sauce off myself but seeing as my shirt is covered I need a clean one. 

"umm... s-sure. I don't look at him and I constantly look around to see if Bree or her minions are anywhere to be seen, which they aren't. Thank fuck for that. 

We finally reach Ashton's locker, he brings out a band shirt with Iron Maiden on it which is also covered in holes. I have noticed Ashton must cut random holes in his shirts all the time because I have never seen him in a shirt that completely covers his skin. 

"Thanks." I still don't make eyecontact with him and run off to the girls bathroom. I really don't want Ashton making things worse even though he is such a little cutie. Fuck my life. 

The shirt is too big for me but thankfully I was wearing jeans so it didn't matter. It smelt of Ashton, its a mixture of soap and a wooden musk. I can't get enough of it. I put my gross shirt into a plastic bag I had in my locker and made my way to the library to book a study room for Michael and I after school. 

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I finally crash into a chair in one of the study rooms in the library. For some reason I am so exhausted and I want to take a nap right here right now. I put my head onto my arms and close my eyes. 

The next thing I know someone is proding me in the head. "Wake up Xanthey you sleepy head." 

I open my eyes to see Michael standing in front of me. "Oh hey Michael, sorry I'm just really tired." 

"Is that Ashton's shirt?"

"Yeah it is. I had pasta sauce all over mine, Ashton let me borrow his."

"We all saw that, Xander is really mad at Bree and had a go at her." 

"He didn't. Urgh he is going to make things worse." I put my head back onto my arms. Seriously this is going to suck. 

"Is Bree bullying you Xanthey? If she is you need to tell someone." 

"No its fine, it was an accident. Sorry I need to go I feel really sick right now." 

"Do you want me to take you home?" 

"No its okay thank you Michael." 

"Thats okay I will start planning our project." 

"No need I already did it, I will make you a copy and give it to you tomorrow." I smiled at Michael and ran out of the room and headed straight to my car. 

I just need to be alone and clear my head of everything that is going on right now, I can't deal with it all. Bree is going to make my life a living hell I know she will. She enjoys it I think, she always smiles every time she pushes me into things or dumps pasta sauce all over me in front of the whole school. I really don't know why she does all this just because she called dibs on Ashton. 

I barge my way into the house straight to the kitchen to grab a snack. I had my head deep into the fridge looking for something good to eat.

"Hey Xanth." I hit my head on the shelf of the fridge. I close the fridge to see Ashton standing with my brother.

"Hi." I don't say anything else and I grab an apple from the fruit bowl and go straight to the library. I know what you're thinking 'she has a library gosh thats a bit extreme' but my mother is a book editior, she reads manuscripts and edits them for a publishing company, basically she is the biggest grammar nazi ever. My father is a sports editior for a magazine, so I guess you could say we have money but we are never known to flash it around and we always have charity donations of stuff we never use. The only I refuse to part with are my books. My parents always buy me books as its my most favourite hobby, along with records. A song just sounds so much better on vinal. I was sitting at my window seat with my body covered by a blanket and there was a knock at the door. 

"Come in." Slowly a wild Ashton appears. He is a little sheepish as I never acknoledged him before. 

"Hey Xanthey, are you okay?" I stare at him for a second and tears build up. Ashton sighs and closes the door behind him as he walks towards me. "Why are you crying babygirl?" 

"Why are you so nice to me? You need to stay away from me Ashton." Ashton furrows his eyebrows

"What do you mean? Is this all because of Bree? If it is you need to ignore her she is just being a bitch." 

"Ashton just know that if you keep talking to me things are going to get worse"

"I'm not letting Bree hurt you like this, its not right." 

"Ashton please just leave me alone." With that I walk out of the library and went straight to my room locking the door behind me. Ashton is such a nice person and doesn't need someone so lame like m edragging him down. He has always noticed me. To him I'm not invisable. This will never work out between us, everyone sees him and wants to be his friend. He is the sun and I am amber wood. 

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ohhhhhh things getting serious yo just you wait for the next chapter you're gonna die. 

ily Jess x