Diary of lavender peaks

11/4/2021

I don't know how long I was out well I didn't really care all I know is I failed to die making even more of a failure and disappointment.

I still hate that I failed my first attempt but was able to feel better by cutting. The pain made me feel better, because i knew I deserved it. I continued cutting til school started again,because the other students cut and beat me. But occasionally I would cut as deep as I can just to see if it would more possible for me to die,but never told anyone I was afraid they would laugh or try to get me to talk about it. So I kept to myself

And soon I was onto 7th grade. My depression got worse and so did my mental state. It went on so I thought that trying to kill yourself was normal. Until I saw a depression quiz and some call help line comments and numbers when I looked up anything with it so I it kept to myself. The last thing I wanted was to be in a mental facility and if my parents found out they would do anything to get rid of me. How would I know? Because they tried. It was at the store and they told me to get something for them,and after I came back with the item they were gone so I dropped the item and tried to find my way home , when I finally got d the house I knocked and after they saw me they just scowled threw me inside and went to there room so I walked up to the attic to see my dresser gone and bed frame just a mattress and pillow but thankfully my clothes were still there

(Small a/n )

I just want to say thank you for reading my book. Hope it's good so far if anyone has questions then I can  answer