"Come here," his voice is gentle again.
She gives in, placing her small hand in his. Lifting the cloth, he sees her blood spill out from her palm. He inhales sharply through his teeth and presses the rag back down. They sit there like that for abo...
"You think you can fuck with ME?!?" He yells, backhanding Jimmy across the face several times. "We had a deal!" Letting out another string of expletives, he pulls out a pocket knife and grabs Jimmy by the collar, tearing his shirt at the neck. Pressing the knife against his cheek, he starts grabbing at the waist of Jimmy's pants.
"Jude! GO! Get out of here now!!" Jimmy pleads, trying to keep him safe, the fear in his eyes inescapable. Jude's heart is pounding, the cocaine high combining with natural adrenaline from the moment, but he stays seated.
"Listen, man! Listen, what do you want? Here, I've got some money. We're sorry, man. Just, just let him go, alright?" With this, Jude opens his wallet and takes out several hundred dollars, throwing it in the drivers lap. "Here! Just, take this, okay? For your trouble. Let him go, put the knife down and just let him go, alright?"
The driver's bloodshot eyes exude his fury as he looks between Jimmy, Jude and the money in his lap. Finally, he folds the pocket knife back up and let go of Jimmy's shirt. "Get the fuck out of my car!" He growls at them as they scramble to open the door and run down the street, back to the park.
They find a payphone and call Mindy to come pick them up. Jimmy is panting, unable to calm down and there are tears in Jude's eyes as he realizes he is the one that instigated that interaction. Of course he wasn't going to follow through, he was researching. He didn't think about how it might go, though. As much as he's learned in the weeks he's been in Portland, he could never have understood how dangerous this can be for these kids.
About thirty minutes go by before they hear the familiar honk of Mindy's car horn. Sitting in her hatchback, Jimmy brings a cigarette to his lips. His hand trembles as he tries to light it.
"Here, man. Let me," Jude's voice is quiet as he lights Jimmy's cigarette.
He takes a long drag and closes his eyes, blood crusting along the corner of his mouth.
"I'm so sorry," is all Jude can muster.
Jimmy shrugs and sits in silence for a bit before responding. "It happens. It happens. Thanks for getting me out. I owe you." The rest of the trip goes in complete silence, Jude staring out the car window replaying what happened in his mind.
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The next morning, the whole crew is shooting a scene in a pancake house. They are smoking, drinking coffee, and just discussing their characters' experiences as hustlers on the street. One character, Steve, is describing his first date experience back when he was twelve. Keanu's character starts to tell his own stories, laughing about them. Jude's character is supposed to interject but when it came time, his eyes are glazed over like he wasn't present in his body.
Keanu gives him a soft punch in the leg, trying to bring him back, but Jude is nowhere to be found. He is riding in the front seat of an el camino, pulling to a stop on a dark street. He can see his hands raised protectively in front of his face as he feels the splitting of his lip. He can hear the sharp click of the pocketknife as it pops out, the cold metal pressing against his flesh. His heart starts racing and without awareness, he starts shaking his head. "No, no, no, no, no...," he whimpers under his breath, able to see the terror on Jimmy's face.
"Jude, Jude, it's okay man. You're here man, breathe in." Keanu is rubbing his hand up and down Jude's back, trying to bring him out. "It's okay."
"CUT!" Calls the director, realizing they aren't going to get any further at this moment. "Let's take a break and reconvene this afternoon?"
Keanu and Jude head back to the beach house. They pull into the driveway and Jude gets out, slamming the car door behind him and speed walking into the house. The dogs start barking, seeking his attention but it looks like he doesn't even see them there. Quietly, Keanu follows shortly behind him, knowing not to try talking to him but also not wanting to leave him alone. He follows him down the hall, then down the stairs to the rec room, into the hallway and into the door of the room he was originally going to use as a bedroom where he has his bags stashed. As Keanu moves towards the doorway to follow him in, Jude slams the door in his face. Standing there for a second, Keanu takes a few steps back and leans against the wall with his right foot propped up. There he plans to wait until his best friend is ready to open the door again.
Inside the bedroom, Jude reaches into the pocket of a backpack and pulls out a small, brown envelope. Hans' bandmate handed it to him one night after a long jam session. "This is the chillest stuff you'll ever get, guaranteed, takes you right to heaven," was his description. "Some like to shoot it up, but I don't like needles so I just snort it like coke," the bandmate instructed.
At the time, Jude thanked him and shoved the envelope into this pocket, forgetting it was even there. He now held the small envelope in his hand, turning it over and over again, thinking about the events from last night. He opens it up, pours the contents out onto the floor and leans over the pile. Soon, he is nowhere near that el camino. Everything feels okay again.
