Classified light- a criminal minds fan fiction

The inevitable Loss

"Did you want to listen to some music?" Morgan broke the silence as he and Cameron drove to the Leed's house to interview the twin sisters.

"No thank you" she kept her head looking out of the window, a glaze over her eyes that concerned Morgan.

"Okay" he nodded before sighing, "Cam listen-"

"Radomir is dying" she interrupted quietly.

"What?" He turned to her, now noticing the tears slowly coming down her forced blank face.

"H-he's been getting more sluggish lately and doesn't enjoy his walks as much but I just thought that was just because Zach and Peter take him on so many, but when I asked them about it they said that Radomir just lies around all day with them. And then... and then I came home this morning and Peter was there crying and said Zach had to rush him to the vets because he had an intense kind of fit."

"Cam, I'm so sorry-"

"He was okay, I went to the vets to see him- that's why I was so late. Zach said that he would be okay for a little while longer but... but I just couldn't leave him again, Morgan, I should have been there, I should have-" she burst into tears, she couldn't help it, the sobs she had been pushing back just came pouring out of her.

She didn't even hear the car pull over before she felt Morgan's arms around her.

"I'm so sorry Cameron" he hugged her closely, "but he survived, he's okay- right?"

Cameron partly nodded through tears, "Z-Zach said he was 'okay for now' but he's just not himself, he looked so sad Morgan- I've never seen him like that. He's such a fighter, he's always making sure I'm okay and always wanting to play. I know he's an older dog but he's always acted like a puppy and I just... he didn't even look like he recognised me when I saw him Derek-"

Her voice was cut off by another sob.

"I-I don't want to lose him, I don't want to say goodbye."

"I know, I'm so sorry" Morgan didn't know what to say; Radomir was Cameron's life, he was her world, he was all she had left of her world.

"Have you told Hotch? I'm sure he'd let you go back so you can spend some time with Radomir before-"

"He would just say I'm silly for being so upset- I know it's stupid but... but Radomir is all I have, he's the only thing that hasn't left me, I can't lose him" she felt herself choking on her tears.

"Did Zach say how long he had left?" Morgan said as he gently rubbed her back to comfort her.

"A few-" she couldn't get the words out, "Derek I can't say goodbye, I can't- I can't lose him."

"This is so sudden, isn't it? Radomir is in great health, you spend most of your pay check on his fancy food and he's always on walks- I don't get it" Morgan shook his head.

"I-I don't know, I thought that too. They're running more tests to see if it's hereditary or something or just his age- I have had him since I was a child, he's grown up with me, he's been with me through everything and- oh god" she burst into another set of tears.

"Hey, hey, hey- let's not talk about it, okay? It's going to be okay, he's going to be fine" Morgan tried to comfort in anyway he could to make her stop crying, such agonising tears of pain.

"I-I can't be alone; I can't lose him" she whispered through sobs.

"Cameron, you're not alone" Morgan looked down at her.

"He's all I have" she looked up at him, "at some point everyone leaves, but not him, he's never left me, a-and now he is leaving me. What am I going to do when everyone else leaves and I don't even have him? I can't be alone again, I can't, I-"