"How do you feel? Now, I mean." Blue said again, when Perth retreated his hand.
"I don't know, I mean I guess I am used to it. It doesn't hurt like it did those first days, now it's just part of the daily program.'' Perth shrugged.
"I meant about him..." The brown eyed boy trailed off.
''Oh." Perth replied in realization. "I don't know. I still have feelings for him, but I don't want to anymore. I am so done hoping." Perth shook his head.
"So, what are you doing with me? Am I some kind of rebound?" Blue couldn't help but question. "I don't want to sound rude, please believe me, but I need to know what's happening here. It's not what you need to answer, but I have to ask, I am sorry."
Perth gave him an apologetic smile. "We're just friends Blue. I didn't tell you all this so I can make moves on you. I just enjoy your company. That's all. Please don't take this confession as if I am trying to justificate if I make any move on you, because it's not what it is."
Blue smiled at him again. "Look Perth, since you've been so sincere with me, I'd like to return the favor and I feel so bad about admitting this but I can't help it. If I am being a hundred percent honest, I kind of like feel happy about your situation."
Perth gasped in horror.
"Please let me finish. I feel happy because it means that I get to have a chance with you. You surely must have noticed that I like you. I have, since the first time I saw you in that hall in uni. I've never been as thankful that my dad was a professor as I was that day, because if he wasn't I would've never seen you. I am embarrassed to say this, but I came everyday for a week that same hour after the day I met you. And when I saw you at my pub that night, I felt it all over again. You can't imagine how my hopes were crushed the minute Saint introduced himself as your husband."
Perth swallowed and blinked. Surely, he had sensed that Blue might like him, but he never expected for the brown eyed boy to say all those things.
Before Perth could speak, Blue added again. "I should've noticed the ring on your fourth finger, but your eyes captivated me entirely. I felt so bad for like trying to go out with you when you were or still are a married man, but now that I know your situation I hope you will give me a chance to know you even more and better, and not just like a friend."
Perth tried to process all the information and to digest it. He looked at the food in front of him and then again at Blue. "I feel honoured that you feel like this about me. But I have to be honest Blue. I am not ready for that kind of relationship with you now, I like you as a person, and you are so good to me."
Blue's eyes flashed a hurt feeling, and Perth felt bad for being that honest, but he didn't want to lead on Blue without him being sure of what he felt. He had yet still a long road to recover from the scars Saint had left on him, making Blue believe they could have something would be immature and childish.
"I'm not dismissing the possibility of us two having something Blue, it's not fair of me in any way, but I need time. I need to know you. Don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not making the same mistake again. It would be foolish of me." Perth said giving him a half of smile, a sincere look on his eyes.
Blue's eyes smiled again. "I won't expect anything from you, just to know me. As I told you I like you very much. Firstly I was just attracted to you, but now that I've known you a bit better, I like you even more." Blue's hand caressed his' again. "I just hope you aren't doing this just so you can make Saint jealous."
Perth shook his head immediately. "Of course not. Look, even if I was, which I am not and would never do that, Saint can't be jealous if he doesn't feel something for me. And he does not. So it would be pathetic of me to try that."
