"Calli, okay lang sa'kin kung matutulog ka, ha. Don't worry. In fact, pwede pa nating i-recline nang kaunti ang upuan mo para maging komportable ka."
We had just driven past our subdivision's entrance when I heard him speak again.
I turned my head to see him. "I'm fine. I don't feel sleepy."
"Sure?"
"Yes."
"Alright. Pero basta kapag inaantok ka, ayos lang talaga. Huwag kang ma-burden. Hindi mo kailangang pilitin ang sarili mo na magising dahil lang nakaupo ka sa shotgun."
I nodded my head subserviently and said, "Okay."
"Dahil hindi ka pa naman inaantok, pwede ba akong magpa-tugtog? Para ako naman 'yung magising." He released an awkward laugh.
I wanted to say it's your car, do what you want. But I figured he'll just tease me if I go that route, so I just said, "Sure."
He smiled and unfurled his arms to reach his phone. When we arrived at the stoplight, he manipulated the screen.
"Napakinggan mo na 'yung record na bigay ni Atom sa'yo?" he asked, raising his gaze shortly.
"Not yet."
I didn't get the chance to listen to it last week. How could I? How could I listen to a song from a vinyl record album that Atom gave when Ahia was in the living room the entire time?
"Gusto mong marinig? Mayroon sila sa Spotify. Siyempre, kapag pinakinggan mo 'yung record sa turntable mo, mas maganda 'yun. Pero at least, this will do for now."
"Okay."
"Here," he said, smiling while looking at his phone. The sound of what appears to be double bass and violin came in. "This is Flowers on the Grave. Ito ang favorite ko na arrangement sa orchestral version. Actually, kahit sa original version, ito rin ang paborito ko sa album nilang You Are Ok. Maganda kasi ang lyrics. There's a line there that says everything is temporary, even the sorrow that you carry." He looked at me and smiled brightly. "Sadness isn't everlasting, Calli."
Something inside me wants to hope that there's truth in what he said. However, my heart struggles to believe it completely.
An anonymous person once said that you can't be too optimistic, because the light at the end of the tunnel may be just another train. And this is what rings so true in my life. I always see one tragedy after another. So, if what he is saying is true that sadness isn't everlasting . . . when does mine stop? Will it really ever stop?
"I hope so," I answered with a rather pessimistic voice.
He pursed his lips and nodded slowly, as if reading my disbelief but letting it go, anyway.
"Try mong pakinggan ang The Maine, neighbor. Hindi ako mapapahiya at hindi ka rin madi-disappoint. Magaganda 'yung mga kanta nila, meaningful pa ang mga lyrics. I could swear by this band."
"Are they your favorite?"
"Yes." He smiled dazzlingly. My eyes winced. Every time I see him grinning like this, I feel like the sun is shining directly in my eyes. It's too blinding. Good Lord, when will I ever get used to the brightness of this person? "Pareho kami ni Cy. Tapos, ang all-time favorite ng isang 'yun ay Saving Grace. It's a nice song, but it's sad. Pero 'yun kasi 'yung kanta ng The Maine na nag-convert sa kaniya mula sa pagiging casual listener to a high-key fan." He laughed. "Kaya naman sobrang memorable sa kaniya."
I stayed quiet and listened to him as he carried on. Surprisingly, I found myself paying attention to every detail of his story. And this time, ungrudgingly.
