New Old Love『BuckyxOC』

[Fourteen]

~Bucky's POV~

Talking about John's wife really seems to hit the nail on the head, but something else catches my attention. 'Doctor Martinez' sounds so weirdly familiar. First the familiar feeling from the hug, then the kiss as if my body recognized her and now that? Deanna Martinez, who are you, and why do I feel like I should know you?

On the other hand, I should leave you alone. Like you said, you're in a relationship with that Torres-guy. And if you're falling in love with him, I won't be in your way. Although, the kiss didn't feel like nothing or a simple apology. It felt more like 'I miss you' but why would you miss me?

We start following Zemo again, unnoticed I glance at Deanna, trying to think about the facts. She knew names of Hydra victims, her presence feels familiar, and then there is that green in her eyes. That damn green that feels so well-known to me. But it just doesn't click. She hates me and wants to be with Torres? Fine, I'll run with it.

~Deanna's POV~

Pacing up and down in the building, Zemo handcuffed to a big metal canister and Barnes holding Walker off from the only entrance Sam went through moments ago, I'm debating with myself if I should call Quin.

"Alright," I stop and look at Barnes, "you have everything under control, I'll go and make a call." Without giving them time for a comment, I leave them alone, pulling my phone out of my back pocket and dial Quin's number.

A click signals that he picked up. "Two calls in one day, to what do I owe the honour?"

My voice cracks with shame. "I did something stupid, Quin. Something very, very stupid and impulsive, and it should've been you, and I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry." Again I start pacing up and down, blaring the explanation out, "I miss you a lot and I said that Barnes doesn't deserve peace -which is obviously wrong- but when I wanted to apologize the words didn't come out, and I panicked and I-" Lowering my voice I whisper my last words, "I kissed him." Stopping in my tracks, I wrap one arm around myself, tapping my fingers against my side.

For some time the call is filled with silence, me nervously waiting for Quin's reaction, but not a single sound comes from the other side of the line. Then he audibly breathes out. "You kissed Sergeant Barnes?"

"It meant- means! Nothing to me. The only kiss that means something to me was our first kiss, Joaquin." Bringing my hand up, I start playing with my hair.

"You mean the one where you thought about him?" He sounds hurt.

"Quin, I-"

"Don't Quin me, Deanna. First you think about him, then you kiss him. What do you expect me to think? How do you expect me to react?" His voice gets a little louder.

My head hanging low, I lean back against the wall, my arm wrapped back around myself. "I don't expect anything from you, Joaquin. However, I know that you're important to me, very important. I never thought I'd have a relationship until we kissed, Joaquin. That was a simple impossibility to me, due to my past." An emotional clump builds in my throat. "Nonetheless, you kissed me again, and I feel safe in your arms. Please, don't-" Tears well up in my eyes and I sniffle. "Please don't leave me," I beg, a single tear running down my face.

Once more, it's silent on the other end. Tormenting me with a soundless debate if he should forgive me or if this is the end of something very short; at least that's my guess. "It really didn't mean anything?" he asks, a crack in his voice.

A sob escaping from my mouth, I sink to the ground, crouching. "No," I breathe out. "Nothing."

"Okay," he mumbles. "We'll talk when you're back. See you, Dee."

"Quin, I-" No, it's not the right time for the l-word. "I miss you."

"I miss you too," another click signals the end of the call.

Wiping away the tears and taking a deep breath, I prepare myself to head back inside, just in time. Barnes is holding off Walker from ruining the plan. "It hasn't been ten minutes, John. Just sit tight."

"Don't do that. Don't patronize me." John turns his head to face James, but keeps walking away. Suspiciously, I observe the situation and shoot a questioning face to Lemar.

The super soldier stays calm, leaning against the door frame. "He knows what he's doing."

Walker turns on his heels, marching over to Bucky. "I'm goin' in." But James stops him, lightly shoving him back, pushing his hand against John's chest. At first, Walker's head hangs low, then he dramatically lifts it and locks eyes with the brunet man in front of him. "This is all really easy for you, isn't it?" he asks, voice very low. "All that serum runnin' through your veins."

Letting out a very audible breath, I strut over to them, strongly gripping John's shoulder, turning him around and slam my fist into his face. "I am so done with your maldita attitude, John Walker!" I exclaim, my chest rising with every angry breath. Lemar pulls me back, trying to keep a fight from breaking out, but I'm not done yet. While Walker glares at me, straightening his jaw, I continue. "I'll spare you any further research, hijo de puta. James didn't have a fucking choice!" Wrapping my hands around the straps of John's halter, I turn us around and him away from the doorway. Shoving him back with my hands. "You want to know my background? I was there! I was fucking there! I heard James scream from the pain, I saw Hydra experimenting on people! Having the serum running through his veins was never a decision that was offered to him! Hydra just did it, not even caring if he'd die or not! James was a fucking experiment, so don't you dare," now I lower my voice, adding a low growl to it and glaring at Walker. "Don't you dare use his past in any way. Especially not if he can't trust his own damn mind."
(damn / son of a bitch)

Brows furrowed, Lemar, Barnes and Zemo watch me and John. He clenches his jaw, glaring at me, he didn't expect an outburst like that. Adjusting the shield on his arm, fastening the straps around his forearm, he starts to walk past me and once again, Barnes keeps him from going through. They exchange a quiet conversation through gazes before Lemar follows Walker to try and arrest Karli. 

"You were part of Hydra?" James carefully asks, approaching me with soft steps.

"Involuntarily," I state coldly. Going up to Zemo, I free him from the handcuffs. "I think Karli has more of the serum with her, and we both know it needs to be destroyed."

"What about him?" Zemo gestures to Bucky, drawing a little smile on my face.

"Don't worry about it. He'll chase after Karli, hopefully forgetting what I said." I give him a light smile before I turn to Barnes. "You'll have to do this on your own. I got someone waiting for me in the states and," interrupting myself with a heavy sigh. "Listen, the kiss, it didn't mean anything, okay? Do me a favour and don't interpret my words and actions. I don't hate you, Barnes. But Joaquin, he gives me stability and I really want things between me and him to work. For that, I'm taking you out of the equation. Perdóname." Turning on my heels, I leave the building and search for the best and fastest way to get back to the US.
(Forgive me.)