My Husband With Scolar Syndrome [ Jenlisa ]

39. A Gift For Victory

“I… I’m not angry, not blaming you, I… I…” How to explain this? Lisa was anxious, worried until her whole face flushed red.

She’s really not angry, she just felt a bit of discomfort. When she couldn’t adapt to something new, she couldn’t help repeating the same thing over and over, this was Lisa’s condition, Lisa really couldn’t control herself.

Lisa clearly knew all the characteristics of her own condition, she had seen many doctors since she was a child, she also had read a lot of books in this area, she can even accurately recite the various reactions that autistic people would have during their onsets, however, whenever this symptoms appears, her brain would be muddled. her right brain would be telling him that she should stop repeating those sentences, but on the other hand, her left brain would act as if it had its own initiative.

Lisa sometimes hated the rationality of her right brain. When she was triggered, she even wished that her right brain’s reasoning would cease to exist. Like this, she wouldn’t feel guilty every time she came back to her senses, she wouldn’t be afraid of the possibility that Jennie would loathe her either.

“I clearly wanted to make you happy by going to the company to find you. Since you blame me, then I won’t go to find you anymore.”

Jennie was still talking, and every word she said made Lisa felt uncomfortable. This discomfort gradually prevailed, helping her right brain to suppress the behavior of the left brain, and Lisa’s urge to repeat those sentences gradually eased down.

“I… I don’t blame you.” If Jennie feels sad hearing it, then she will stop this behavior in the future, at least, she won’t make any noise.

Yes, just don’t say anything, just repeat it inside, this way, Jennie won’t find out about it. Or just go home and write it in the notebook, in short, as long as it’s not discovered by Jennie then it’s okay. If I’m not discovered, then Jennie wouldn’t hate me.

“I won’t do it again in the future.” After finding a solution, Lisa spoke with a lot of confidence, “I’m not angry, you have to come and find me again.” she likes it when Jennie went to find her, likes it when she raised her head and suddenly finds her standing there, Lisa even felt that maybe in the future, she would subconsciously look outside from time to time when she’s  in the office.

Jennie gazed at Lisa who vowed in all sincerity, her heart felt complicated: Have I guided her correctly?

Professor Wang said that an autistic person’s life path is extremely simple, they don’t do socializing, living by themselves, and even studying things alone. Their daily life’s trajectory is like a single straight line, and there will never be forks or turns, therefore, once they’re determined that their path was suddenly disrupted, they would easily become uneasy. They will express their uneasiness and urgency through actions, words, and all other behaviors that they can use. If the level of anxiety is too great and reached a certain point, their condition can easily get triggered to a break out.

Lisa became anxious because she can’t go home on time, leaving work early and not eating within the determined time, but this level of anxiety still wasn’t enough to make him troubled, although it can’t be helped that it made him lose control by repeatedly saying the same things over and over. she needed to relieve her uneasiness through this repetition, as it was actually a method of her self-regulation. To put it more seriously, she was actually treating himself.

However, right now, Lisa was willing to stop this treatment because of her few words.

Is it right to do it like this? Jennie was hesitant. On one hand, she hoped that Lisa can become better, even a little bit of progress was needed, but on the other hand, she didn’t want Lisa to feel uncomfortable.