fifty-eight

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Nothing further happened than that shared kiss. Tony did end up falling asleep next to Y/N on the bed, but that was normal for them. When they woke up though, that's when it became awkward.

"What do we do now?" Y/N asked quietly.

The two were lying side by side, with Tony holding Y/N's hand. He thumb rubbed along the back of it as they stared at the ceiling.

"I don't know," he answer quietly. "You have a point about Pepper... I don't know what would happen to the company if we broke up."

"So you won't. But then we can't kiss anymore, or share feelings, because I'm not that type of person." Tony stayed silent. "I can't do that to Pepper or myself. And I'm not willing to become a nation wide scandal."

"That's understandable."

"That also means you should probably let go of my hand and get off the bed." Tony didn't make a move to leave. "I'm serious, Tony. The more we talk, the closer we get, the more I want you for myself. And I can't... so, I think that it's wise if we don't sleep together in more and-"

"Even if it's the only way for us to get a deceit night of rest?"

"Yes, Tony. I think that it might be best for us to spend time apart."

"Did that help the last time?" Tony moved so that he was laying on his side, looking at her. "If I recall correctly, we didn't speak to each other for a year and that didn't stop our feelings."

"Maybe we don't completely ignore each other... Maybe we just stay on our sides on the country. You stay in Malibu and I stay in DC, with the exception of missions."

"I don't know, Y/N-"

"We can call and text each other but can't physically see each other unless someone else is with us, at all times."

"Do you not trust me?"

"It's not that," Y/N sighed. "It's that I don't trust myself."

"If that's what you really want..."

"It's what we need to do, Tony. We can't be together. I'm sorry."

~~~

December was here before Y/N knew it. Tony and her had been good and following their rules, for each other. But that didn't make it any easier for either of them. Y/N was back in LA for a mission right before Christmas when she got a call from Rhodey.

"Have you heard from Tony lately?" Rhodey asked.

"No," she responded, cleaning her guns at the table of the safe house she was in. "Not since last night, why?"

"I was just at lunch with him and he was acting very strange. He rushed out of there before we got our food and he hasn't been answering my messages."

"That's strange."

"Yeah. Is there anyway you can swing by and check on him?"

"Oh, I don't know, Rhodey. I-"

"Please, Y/N. He listens to you, most of the time anyway. And you two haven't physically seen each other in a while. It might do you both some good."

"I'll just call him."

"Y/N, listen to me. Something is wrong. You can't see it because you don't see him often enough. But I see it, Happy sees it, and Pepper sees it. He won't open up to any of us though. Just, please Y/N, stop by and see what's up."

"Fine," she sighed. "I'll let you know if I find anything."

After hanging up, Y/N took her sweet time heading to Tony's. She needed to prepare herself to try and not jump his bones the second she saw him. When she arrived at the mansion, Y/N didn't bother knocking and just walked in.

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