Behind The Lyrics [L.S]

𝑴𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒔 // 𝕎𝕙𝕖𝕣𝕖 𝔻𝕠 𝔹𝕣𝕠𝕜𝕖𝕟 ℍ𝕖𝕒𝕣𝕥𝕤 𝔾𝕠?

“Don’t call me Haz, please.”

“Ok, Did you get up with your left foot today?”

“No, I’m perfectly fine.” - I smiled. - ”I’ll go check on my other clients, excuse me.” - I said to get rid of Jonah.

I was in a really good mood to let him ruin it.

So, I walked away from him to look for my other clients around the backstage dressing rooms.

I didn’t do much other than just walk around and make sure that my clients had everything they needed. I bumped into some old friends from the industry and I excitedly told them that I was moving to New York in a month. Most of them seemed happy for me, others just showed envy, but that's how it is.

I looked down at my phone to see if Louis had replied to my message, knowing that he was probably heading to the airport already.

Just by thinking of him I felt a shiver down my spine.
I wanted to be with him, I wanted to feel his love again, I wanted to lay beside him, I just couldn’t hide it, and it showed in my smile and the butterflies in my stomach.

I didn’t see any reply to my message and that discouraged me for a bit, but then I saw the time.

Nine more hours to have him here.

I felt a smile forming on my face, my heart beating harder, time escaping me.
And just like that, as if I had invoked him, a message popped up on my screen.

Lou.

I rushed to open it, feeling happy to know he was on his way.

“Harry, I’m sorry, I can’t go. I’ll pay you for the tickets. I just can't get on that plane.”

My breathing stopped. He can't come?

I tried to call him several times after reading, but he didn't reply to any of them.
I ran away from the venue and quickly got inside my car for more privacy.

I wanted to scream out my lungs. I wanted to talk to him, to have answers. And just like that the tears started to stream down my face, making it harder for me to think clearly.

I was so damn excited about seeing him, and now he is not coming?

With my trembling hands I picked up my phone again, trying over and over to communicate with him.
I texted multiple times as well, but still I didn't get any answers.

I hit the steering wheel several times, letting out all of my anger and my sadness.

I felt so helpless, so lost.
My eyes already glossed with tears, but I wanted to cry even harder.
But I only could sit there and stare at my hands, my fucking hands that reminded me of him.

_______

After a while, I went back to my house and closed the door behind me, throwing the keys aside, not caring about anything else than my selfish self and my angst heart.
I didn't want to be seen, I didn't want to be heard, I didn't want to be without him.

Two hours had passed without a reply.

I felt like someone had taken my heart, ripped it out of my chest and stomped on it.

It hurt, it burnt, it stung.
It pinched and pulled, it split in two.

I felt like I was breaking inside.

Why doesn't he reply?

I shut the door of my bedroom, I turned the lights off and let myself collapse on the mattress.
Nothing else but my sobs echoing in the room.