What I Am

11: what am I doing?

We were still walking.

All of us having a great time.

"Hey Brady, do something already!" The other guy said.

"I'm working on it!"

"What are you guys planning?!" I asked.

"I-It's nothing!" He responded.

I let go of Samantha and get close to them.

"What're you guys planning?" I asked.

"We can handle it Pauline don't worry," Donnie said.

"But I want in!" I said.

"No, I won't do it anymore," Brady said.

"Oh come on!" The guys said.

"We barely started the school year,"

"It doesn't matter, you guys met a long time ago,"

"What was he gonna do?" I whispered to one guy.

"You might blow it, you'll know eventually," he answered.

"Okay sure,"

I went back to Samantha and held her arms again.

"What were you guys talking about?" She asked.

"It's nothing, They won't tell me anyway,"

"That's okay, you can just stay here in my arms,"

"Yay!"

Brady stopped closing in on us and went with his friends.

"You're really not gonna do it anymore?" I asked to him.

"Do what?" Samantha asked.

"N-nothing, I was gonna do nothing,"

"Hm,"

We finally separated paths and went to walk to our own house.

...

*I arrive home,

"I'm home!" I shouted.

"Guess no ones else is home,"

I went straight to my bedroom.

And to make sure, I checked all my school stuff to see if I need to do something.

And I didn't have to do anything.

What was I even thinking it's literally our second day.

*Door opens

"I'm home!" Someone shouts.

I go down to check on it.

"Hey sweetie,"

"Hi mom, welcome home!"

"How was your second day at school today?"

"It's great,"

"I'm making a few friends," I added

"That's nice to hear,"

"How was your work Mom?"

"It was fine, just had some pretty troublesome students at class,"

My mom teaches a grade higher in my school.

"You know, If you needed something you can just go to me," Mom said.

"I know, But I don't really want to,"

"Why is that?"

"It's pretty far, I'm too lazy to go to your place,"

"It is pretty far,"

"Anyway, you better get things ready,"

"Ready what things?" I asked.

"We're gonna cook dinner together, how's that sound?"

"But I don't know anything about cooking," I said.

"That's why I am here,"

I hugged her.

"So what're we cooking mom?"

"Hm, I haven't thought about it yet,"

"Why don't you choose?" Mom asked

"But mom, I can't cook," I said.

"Oh right, why don't you just observe me while I cook,"

"That would be great," I said.

...

Cooking done,

"Did you get all that?"

"I guess so, I didn't get to pay attention to most of it,"

"You'll get it eventually," mom said.

"Thanks mom," I said as I hug her.

***

I woke up.

"Hm?"

"I must have dozed off,"

I went down to see if mom or dad has arrived.

"Nothing,"

"Not even seeing anything they own,"

I sat down and started to tear up, knowing that what I dreamt of would never happen in real life.

"Only in my dreams," I said.

I stopped all that and started to cook myself some instant food.

"It's just you and me, instant noodles," I said and laughed.

When suddenly someone arrives.

It was Dad.

"Pauline! Pauline!" He shouted.

"Y-yes?" I asked.

"What the hell are you doing, where's my food?!" Dad asked.

"Oh, mom hasn't arrived yet so-,"

He slaps me.

"Are you stupid? Look at what time it is,"

"You should've started cooking when your mom hasn't arrived yet,"

"Y-yes sir,"

I never really know how to cook.

I got finished with whatever I did and brought it to dad.

"What the hell is this?!" He said then throws the it away.

"Are you trying to kill me?"

"N-no, I still don't know how to co--,"

"Well you should know, you're a girl, you should know that!" He said.

"What does being a girl have to do with this?"

"Oh, you're fighting back are you?"

He pulls me and drags me to my room.

"You better stay there and learn about what you did!" He said then slams the door.

I went to my bed and cried on my pillows.

"I hate this,"