A Court of Stars and Shadows

chapter five

"you've always loved the strange birds, now i want to fly into your world, i want to be heard. my wounded wing's still beating, you've always loved the stranger inside, me, ugly pretty." - strange birds

TW: this chapter speaks of abuse, sexual assault, and mental health issues.

───── ★★★─────

Gwyn was sitting in her new bedroom in the House of Wind, simply staring out her window, down upon Velaris. The sun was setting over the mountainous terrain and she found that she felt at peace amongst her inner turmoil.

Today was Nesta's mating ceremony with Cassian, and she was truly debating on going even though she said she would. It hurts her to know that she still cannot venture out too far into the beautiful city.

The city she wanted so badly to call home, but she couldn't. How could she call it home when she had not explored it?

There was a soft knock at the door, and she quickly wiped the tears she had only just realized escaped her eyes.

She walked over to the door and opened it, only to find Azriel leaning against the door frame, dressed in a black dress shirt which was unbottoned at the top and tucked into black dress pants. He had a silver chain hanging from his neck, and rings adorning his hands. His black hair was styled in a messy sort of way, and Gwyn had to close her jaw.

He looked swoon worthy. He cleared his throat, and stuffed his hands in the pocket of his pants. His eyes were amused as he looked at her.

"Hey," he greeted her smoothly.

"Hey," she greeted, and he frowned as if his shadows whispered something to him.

"Have you been crying?" he asked her softly.

"No," she denied, but relented when he raised an eyebrow and gave her a reproachful look. "Yes."

"Why?" he asked her, his brows furrowing.

"It's just...I'm afraid of going out into the city. It's stupid I know but—"

"No, it's not stupid. It's completely understandable." He murmured, hesitantly reaching out but he brushed a red curl behind her arched ear gently, and she leaned into his touch.

"Gwyn, if you're not up to going, they'll understand." He whispered and she pulled away from him, closing her eyes.

"No! I'm going to go! If not for them, then for myself." She said, and Azriel stared at her. She looked so beautiful, despite recently crying. She was determined, and so very brave.

Something sparked in his chest as he stared at her. Her cheeks flushed, her irises so blue popping out against her red rimmed eyes.

She made him feel emotions he had never felt before, and he wasn't sure how he was meant to handle that.

"Az?" She asked, her face suddenly in front of his with a worried expression. That was when he realized that he was staring, and when he realized she was wearing the stolstice necklace he had gifted her.

"That's a beautiful necklace." he blurted out, and her brows furrowed before she smiled.

"Oh, yeah it was an anonymous present for the Winter Solstice." She murmured, fidgeting with it with a small smile on her face.