Sabır (Patience) - Kurulus Osman

Chapter 35

"Didn't you tie him up before we left?! Didn't you?!" Ceyda heard Osman thunder. She calmed herself and headed inside.

"I didn't, Bey," Konur answered in a quiet voice, not meeting Osman's eyes.

Osman raised his hand and slapped Konur onto the ground. Ceyda gasped as she saw the scene and rushed in front of Osman. "Beyim, please. It's not his fault. Hit me. I'm the one who couldn't hold him off."

"Move out of the way, Ceyda."

"Bey."

"Ceyda!"

Ceyda gulped silently and did so, watching Konur pitifully.

"Get up! You failed your mission, at least don't fall in front of me!"

Ceyda flinched at Osman's yells that seemed as if they could shake the ground. She could see Konur blinking back tears as he slowly stood up. Osman effortlessly grabbed Konur's armour and slammed him against the wall of the cave. Ceyda gasped and gripped her fists to stop herself from intervening.

Osman then wrapped his hand around Konur's throat furiously. Ceyda blinked back tears and placed her hand on Osman's arm to stop him from choking Konur.

"Kill me, Beyim," Konur permitted, struggling to breathe.

"Why didn't you tie Kongar? Why were you not careful?"

Ceyda looked at Konur, pleading for him to tell Osman.

"I can't tell you, Beyim. I'm ashamed."

Ceyda sniffed and Osman tightened his grip on Konur's neck and watched him carefully, "What can't you tell me, Konur? What can't you tell me?!"

Konur wasn't answering, so Osman shook him, "What can't you tell me, Konur?!"

Konur said nothing, and Ceyda rubbed Osman's arm, "Bey, please." Osman grunted in anger and removed his hands from Konur's neck, holding it behind him as if he was about to strike Konur again.

"You will make me a companion killer!" Osman threw down his hand and turned around. "Get out! I don't want to see you."

Konur walked to Osman sincerely, "I won't. I won't leave." Osman glared at him, but Konur continued, "You can tear my heart out of my chest, but I won't leave your side!"

Ceyda watched Konur admirably. She always respected his loyalty to Osman Bey and his friends. It was one of that many things that brought them close.

"Then why didn't you tie Kongar?" Osman questioned again. "Why?"

"Kongar... is my missing brother, Goktug," Konur finally notified, making Ceyda sigh in relief.

Osman's anger slowly faded and continued to watch his teary-eyed companion with slight pity. Then, he turned to Ceyda, exhaled, and walked out.

Ceyda watched him leave, then rubbed her hand on Konur's arm as tears slowly fell down his cheeks. He sighed in frustration and guilt and slammed his hands against the cave. Ceyda backed away a little as he paced around and leaned his head against the wall. "It's my fault. It's my fault. It's my fault," he cried. Konur punched his fist against the wall over and over. Ceyda tutted and held his fist before he hurt himself again. "It's my fault."

"Hayir, Konur. Don't say that. You did what was necessary."

"If you killed your brother, I wouldn't forgive you," Samsa Bey declared, entering the cave. He nodded at Ceyda and she smiled at him thankfully. "Konur, he is your brother," Samsa continued.

Konur shut his eyes and tears continued falling from it.

Samsa stayed silent for a while, then spoke, "My brother Alp Boru was martyred in the Mongol raid... in front of my eyes. If he had survived and become a Mankurt..." Samsa smiled sadly and looked at his two hands. "I would beat him back to his senses with these. I just wish I knew he was breathing." He exhaled deeply, "Alp Boru is now with Allah. I can't do anything but pray for him."