Belonging | Alec Lightwood

(48) Hurricane

I wouldn't waste my time with her being angry or resentful, we've lost so much already- I needed her.

"Come, sit with me" She smiles, pulling me down, sitting herself on the bench between Clary and I. "I hear from Clary that you've had quite the experience here- something about stopping a Lightwood wedding?" She asks teasingly, her eyes turning to me with a knowing smirk.

"I hate you Clary" I mutter, glaring at her as she shrugs, smiling back with a sisterly evil.

"Love you too Cam" She winks, looping her arm through my mothers.

"His name is Alec, Maryse's son?" She asks, though it seems rhetorical, "I saw him as a child, beautiful little boy and from what I saw after waking up he's maintained his good looks, wouldn't you agree, Camilla?" My mom asks, her and Clary's joyous laughter echoing as they take in my flushed cheeks and embarrassed groan.

"Guys" I moan, jutting out my bottom lip childishly, though my heart was warm at us being able to be together like this again.

It was just like old times.

"No secrets, remember?" My mom scolds lightly and I sigh, a small smile gracing my lips.

"Alec and I are- I don't know, complicated. We haven't talked about how we feel or anything yet and he's very confusing and fickle, I don't think he even knows what he wants. There's too much happening for us to worry about whatever the hell we are, anyways." I mutter, looking at my mother's confusing and blank expression.

She always was the queen of hiding what she thought.

"You like him? A lot, from what I can tell- it's different than the other guys you've dated in the past" She states quietly, her hand caressing my palm as she talks, calming me. I nod, agreeing with her, though the knot in my throat doesn't let me speak.

"It will work out, Alec seems like a good boy and from what Clary has told me, you two are rather sweet together- the chaos of this world, the Shadow world, makes relationships hard, you just have to try much harder to get what you want- even if your both acting as barriers yourself".

"Thanks mom" I whisper, my voice cracking slightly as she grins at me, her fingers soothing my hair. "I've missed this, missed talking about stupid stuff like boys and feelings, I'm glad that you're here for me to talk to- I felt empty when you weren't."

"I'm not going anywhere, my love- but you, you need to go find that stupid boy and fix whatever argument you're having, I could sense your sadness from the second you stepped into the room." She scolds, making Clary and I chuckle, knowing we can't get anything past her.

I shake my head disbelievingly at her, before standing and kissing her cheek lightly, a grateful smile on my face as I leave.

***

I saunter through most of the institute for a while, looking around and sliding in and out of the crowds of people, all scurrying around, each with responsibilities of their own.

I finally reach the roof after a little while of searching, and expectantly, Alec is there, leaning over the ledge, staring out at the darkness lit only by the dozens of buildings across New York.

We stand in silence for a while, the only sounds heard are the bustle of the NYC night and our breaths, harsh due to the cold and sharpness of the wind colliding against us.

"I'm sorry for how I reacted before, it wasn't personal" Alec mutters, his body and eyes facing the expanse of night, not turning to look back at me.

I sigh, stepping forwards, moving to stand next to him. "It's alright, I understand that you're not in a good place right now-it's not easy, I get it" I whisper, my body set and tone cautious, not wanting him to feel cornered.