under the same star }} e.p

chapter 15.5 : crude truth

i traveled back to aslan's how and for a second thought "blair must be on her feet to know what miraz had said to me" but then i remembered.

as i went inside everyone came in my direction. peter, especially, was eager to know miraz's response.

"he said yes, grimly, but yes. you'll be having a duel soon"

everyone cheered and tried to change peter's serious expression. i knew he was nervous about this whole "challenging- the-king" thing but everyone knows peter's going to win.

caspian came out of one of the tunnel hallways and asked what of the response. we updated him and he announced that he already had a plan. he's not that bad in terms of planning and all those sorts of stuff.

as much as i tried i couldnt keep my mind of what i said to blair.

im so stupid!

i know how much she hates being called miraz's daughter, i know how much i hurt her by basically calling her weak.

she's so far from weak. she's brave, definitely smart and clever.

i don't know what possessed me when i told her all of those things. but i cant lie, what she told me also hurt.

i cant blame her. she wanted to check up on me before leaving and i acted like a jerk.

"edmund, i need to talk to you for a second. can i?"

caspian laid a hand across my shoulders and led me into a more quiet and reserved area.

he removed his hand and stood in front of me.

"you look distracted. im sure it doesn't have anything to do with alexa- i mean blair, right?" he asked, looking embarrassed for that small slip up.

i paused for a moment because i didnt know how to come around the topic without sounding weird.

"it does have something to do with her.." i admitted.

he shook his head with a smile on his face. i have a feeling caspian is one those that think they have the wisest advice ever. well maybe he does, im not certain.

he sighed and crossed his arms while looking up, maybe trying to find for an adequate response.

"first of all, why are you so worried about her? she's got susan and lucy. its not like blair doesn't know how to defend herself or anything"

i rubbed my eyes and dropped my arms to my sides.

"i really messed up, caspian," i ran my hand through my hair trying to come up with the right words.

"guessing from her expressions she looked like she genuinely meant what she said. i don't think our..." i peered at caspian for a moment and i considered my word choice carefully. "...friendship will ever be the same"

he nodded through everything i said making me slightly uneasy. his face looked like he remembered something funny.

"she isnt the type to keep resentment for a long time towards someone, well, only to those who really hurt her"

his "wise" words weren't helping at all, in fact it was making my thoughts worse.

"don't worry, ed. your friendship with her will be fine"

he patted my shoulder before walking in the direction we came from.

my stomach went into a knot when i realized the crude truth.

that girl really broke down all of my emotional walls and i dont have any idea how or when.

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a/n: i am so sorry about the slow updates. ive been trying to write as much as i can while balancing other matters. i hope yall understand <3

by the way, we are getting towards the end of the book and im planning a very brutal ending so beware! ;)